TRULY hath the poet said that, “Trifles
swell the sum of human happiness and woe.”
Our highest and holiest aspirations, our purest and
warmest affections, are frequently called forth by
what in itself may be deemed of trivial importance.
The fragrant breath of a flower, the passing song
of the merry milk-maid, a soothing word from one we
love, will often change the whole current of our thoughts
and feelings, and, by carrying us back to the days
of childhood, or bringing to our remembrance some
innocent and happy state which steals over us like
a long-forgotten dream, will dissipate the clouds
of sorrow, and even the still deeper shades of falsity
and evil.
How many of the great events of life
have their origin in trifles; how many deep, heart-felt
sorrows spring from neglect of what seemed to us a
duty of little or no account—something that
could be done or left undone as we pleased!
Alas! this is a dangerous doctrine.
Let us endeavour to impress upon the minds of our
children that no duty is trifling; that nothing which
can in any way affect the comfort and happiness of
others is unimportant.
The happiness of domestic life, particularly
of married life, depends almost wholly upon strict
attention to trifles. Between those who are united
by the sacred tie of marriage, nothing should be deemed
trivial. A word, a glance, a smile, a gentle touch,
all speak volumes; and the human heart is so constituted
that there is no joy so great, no sorrow so intense,
that it may not be increased or mitigated by these
trifling acts of sympathy from one we love.
Nearly three months had elapsed since
the papers had duly announced to the public that Mary,
daughter of Theodore Melville, had become the bride
of Arthur Hartwell; and the young couple had returned
from a short bridal tour, and were now quietly settled
in a pleasant little spot which was endeared to Arthur
by having been the home of his youthful days.
He had been left an orphan at an early age, and the
property had passed into the hands of strangers, but
he continued to cherish a strong attachment for the
“old place,” as he termed it, and he heard
with joy, some few months before his marriage, that
it was for sale; and without even waiting to consult
his intended bride, he purchased it for their future
home. This was a sad disappointment to Mary,
for she had fixed her affections upon a pretty romantic
little cottage, half hid by trees and shrubbery, which
was situated within two minutes’ walk of her
father’s house; and which, owing to the death
of the owner, was offered for sale upon very favourable
terms. In her eyes it possessed every advantage,
and as she mentally compared it with the old-fashioned
dwelling of which Arthur had become the possessor,
she secretly conceived a strong prejudice against
the spot where the duties and pleasures of the new
sphere which she was about to enter were to commence;
particularly as it was five miles distant from her
parents, and not very near to any of her early friends.
Some faint attempts were made to induce
Arthur to endeavour to get released from his bargain,
and to become the purchaser of the pretty cottage,
but in vain. He was delighted to have become the
owner of what appeared to him one of the loveliest
spots on the earth, and assured Mary that the house
was vastly superior to any cottage, advancing so many
good reasons for this assertion, and describing in
such glowing terms the beauty of the surrounding scenery,
and the happiness they should enjoy, that she could
not help sympathizing with him, although her dislike
to her future home remained unabated.
The first few weeks of her residences
there passed pleasantly enough, however. All
was new and delightful. The grounds about the
house, although little cultivated, were beautiful in
the wild luxuriance of nature; the trees were loaded
with rich autumnal fruits; and even the old-fashioned
mansion, now that it was new painted, and the interior
fitted up in modern style, assumed a more favourable
aspect. It was a leisure time with Arthur, and
he was ever ready to accompany Mary to her father’s;
so that she became quite reconciled to the distance,
and even thought it rather an advantage, as it was
such a pleasant little ride.
But as the season advanced, Arthur
became more engrossed with business. The rides
became less frequent, and Mary, accustomed to the
society of her mother and sister, often passed lonely
days in her new home, and her dislike to it in some
degree returned. Her affection for her husband,
however, prevented the expression of these feelings,
and she endeavouved to forget her loneliness in attention
to household duties; reading, and music; but these
resources would sometimes fail.
It was one of those bright afternoons
in the latter part of autumn, when the sun shines
forth with almost summer-like warmth, and the heart
is gladdened with the departing beauty of nature.
Mary was seated alone in her pleasant parlour, with
her books and her work by her side.
“How I wish Arthur would return
early!” she said, aloud, as she gazed from their
open window. “It will be such a lovely evening.
We could have an early tea, and ride over to father’s
and return by moonlight; it would be delightful;”
and filled with this idea, she really expected her
husband, although it still wanted two hours of the
usual time of his return; and laying aside her work,
began to make some preparations for the evening meal.
She was interrupted by a call from an old friend who
lived nearly two miles distant, and, intending to
pass the afternoon at Mr. Melville’s, had called
to request Mary to accompany her.
The young wife was in considerable
perplexity. She had a great desire to go to her
father’s, but she was unwilling to have Arthur
return home and find her absent; and moreover, she
felt a strong impression that he would himself enjoy
the ride in the evening, and would, perhaps, be disappointed
if she were not at home to go with him. So, with
many thanks the invitation was declined, the visiter
departed, and Mary returned with a light heart to the
employment which the visit had interrupted.
Janet, the assistant in the kitchen,
entered into the feelings of her mistress, and hastened
to assist her with cheerful alacrity, declaring that
she knew “Mr. Hartwell would be home directly,—it
was just the evening for a ride,” &c.&c.—this
ebullition of her feelings being partly caused by
sympathy with the wishes of her young mistress, and
partly by her own desire to have the house to herself
for the reception of some particular friends, who had
promised to favour her with their company that evening.
But alas! the hopes of both mistress
and maid were destined to be disappointed. The
usual time for Arthur’s return passed by, and
still he did not appear, and it was not until the deepening
twilight had almost given place to the deeper shades
of evening, that Mary heard his well known step, and
springing from the sofa where she had thrown herself
after a weary hour of watching, she flew to the door
to greet him.
“Oh, Arthur!” she exclaimed,
forgetful that he was quite ignorant of all that had
been passing in her mind for the last few hours, “how
could you stay so late? I have waited for you
so long, and watched so anxiously. It is quite
too late for us to go now.”
“Go where, Mary?” was
the surprised reply. “I did not recollect
that we were to go anywhere this evening. I know
I am rather late home, but business must be attended
to. I meant to have told you not to expect me
at the usual hour.”
This was too bad. To think that
she had refused Mrs. Elmore’s kind invitation,
and had passed the time in gazing anxiously from the
window, when she might have enjoyed the society of
father, mother, and all the dear ones at home; and
now to find that Arthur actually knew that he should
not return till late, and might have saved her this
disappointment, it was really very hard; and Mary turned
away to hide the starting tears, as she replied,
“You might have remembered to
have told me that you should not be home till dark,
Arthur, and then I could have gone with Mrs. Elmore.
She called to ask me to ride over to father’s
with her, but I would not go, because I felt so sure
that you would come home early and take me to ride
yourself this pleasant evening.”
“You had no reason to expect
it,” said Arthur, rather shortly, for he felt
irritated at the implied reproach of Mary’s words
and manner, and for the first time since their marriage,
the husband and wife seated themselves at the table
with unkind feelings busy in their hearts. Mary
remained quite silent, while Arthur vented his irritation
by giving the table an impatient jerk, exclaiming,
“I really wish Janet could learn
to set a table straight! I believe her eyes are
crooked.”
This was an unfortunate speech, for
Mary, in her desire to expedite Janet’s preparations
for tea, had herself arranged the table; at another
time she would have made a laughing reply, but just
now she did not feel like joking, and the remark only
increased the weight at her heart.
These grievances may seem very trifling,
and indeed they are so; but our subject is trifles,
and if the reader will examine his own heart, he will
find that even little troubles sometimes produce a
state which even the addition of a feather’s
weight renders insupportable.
Thus it was with Mary. She made
an ineffectual attempt to eat, but the food seemed
to choke her; and rising abruptly, she seated herself
at the piano and commenced a lively tune in order to
hide her real feelings.
There was nothing strange in this.
Arthur frequently asked her to play to him when be
felt disposed to remain at the table longer than she
did, and he had often said that he liked the ancient
custom of having music at meals; but this evening
music had lost its charm; the lively tune was not
in unison with his state of feeling, and he hastily
finished his supper and left the room. This was
another trial, and the ready tears gushed from Mary’s
eyes as she left the piano, and summoning Janet to
remove the tea things, she bade her tell Mr. Hartwell
when he came in, that she had a bad headache and had
gone to her own room.
Arthur returned from his short walk
in less than half an hour, quite restored to good
humour by the soothing effects of the lovely evening,
and somewhat ashamed that he had been disturbed by
so trifling a cause.
“Perhaps Mary would like to
take a walk,” he said, to himself, as he entered
the house. “It is not too late for that,
and to-morrow I will endeavour to take the wished-for
ride.”
He was disappointed when Janet delivered
the message, and going up stairs opened the door of
their sleeping apartment; but Mary’s eyes were
closed, and fearful of disturbing her, he quietly returned
to the parlour and endeavoured to amuse himself with
a book until his usual hour of going to rest.
The next morning all seemed as usual;
for sleep has a renovating power on the mind as well
as the body, and in little troubles as well as in
great.
Husband and wife spoke affectionately
to each other, and secretly wondered how such trifles
could have disturbed them; but no allusion was made
to the subject, for the very reason that the unpleasant
feeling which had arisen between them had sprung from
so trifling a cause. The trouble could scarcely
be defined, and therefore they judged it better to
say nothing about it. In some cases this is well,
but, generally, it is better to speak openly even of
little difficulties; especially those which may arise
in the first part of married-life, as this frankness
enables husband and wife to gain an insight into all
those trifling peculiarities of character which each
may possess, and on attention to which, much of their
future happiness may depend.
Weeks and months passed on, and, apparently,
all was going happily with our young friends.
Mary had become more accustomed to passing some hours
of each day alone, and her solitude was frequently
enlivened by a visit from her mother, sister, or some
young friend of her school-girl days. Arthur
still appeared devotedly attached to her, and she
certainly returned his affection most sincerely, and
yet both felt that there was a change. It could
scarcely be defined, and no cause could be assigned
for it. They would have indignantly rejected
the idea, that they loved each other less than formerly,
but there was certainly less sympathy between them;
they were not so closely united in every thought and
feeling as they once had been. No unkind words
had passed on either side, at least none which could
really be regarded as such, for the trifles which had
gradually produced this feeling of separation were
almost too insignificant to call forth absolute unkindness;
yet still they did their work slowly but surely.
Mary was the petted child of indulgent
parents. Arthur had early lost both father and
mother, and his childhood had passed with but little
of the genial effects of female influence. He
had spent most of his time at a school for boys, where,
although his intellect was well cultivated, and his
morals strictly attended to, there was little done
to call forth those warm affections of which every
young heart is susceptible. And as he grew to
manhood, although his principles were excellent, and
his feelings warm and tender, there was a want of
that kindliness and gentleness of manner, and above
all, of that peculiar faculty of adapting himself to
the wants of a female heart, which would not have
existed had he been blessed with the care of a mother,
or the affectionate sympathy of a sister.
His acquaintance with Mary before
their marriage had been of short duration, and these
traits in his character had passed unobserved during
the excitement of feeling which generally marks the
days of courtship; but as this state passed away,
and his usual habits returned, Mary’s sensitive
heart was often wounded by trifling inattentions,
although never by wilful neglect. Arthur was fond
of study, and in his leisure hours he would sometimes
become so entirely absorbed in some favourite author,
that even Mary’s presence was forgotten, and
the evening passed away without any effort on his
part to cheer her evidently drooping spirits.
Not that he was really selfish: it was mere thoughtlessness,
and ignorance of those attentions which a woman’s
heart demands. If Mary had requested him to lay
aside his graver studies and read aloud in some work
interesting to her, or pass an hour in cheerful conversation,
or listening to music, he would have complied without
hesitation, and, indeed, with pleasure; but she remained
silent, secretly yearning for little acts of kindness,
which never entered the mind of her husband.
Another peculiarity which gave the young wife much
pain, was that Arthur never or very rarely uttered
words of commendation or approval. If anything
was wrong he noticed it at once, and requested a change;
but if right, he never praised. This is a common
error, and it is a great one. Approval from those
we love is as refreshing to the human heart as the
dew to the fading flower; and to at woman’s
heart it is essential: without it all
kindly affections wither away; the softest, most delicate
feelings become blunted and hard; the heart no longer
beats with warm, generous emotions—it is
cold, palsied, and dead.
Even in the most trifling details
of domestic life, approval is encouraging and sweet.
The weary wife and mother who has passed through a
day of innumerable little vexations and difficulties,
is cheered by the pleasant smile with which her husband
takes his seat at the tea-and feels new life as she
listens to his commendations of some favourite dish
which she has placed before him.
True, it is but a trifle, but it speaks to the heart.
We will give our readers a short specimen
of the habit to which we allude. Breakfast was
on the table, and a part of the hot cakes and smoking
ham had been duly transferred to Arthur’s plate.
He ate sparingly, and his looks plainly showed that
something was wrong. Presently he said—“Mary,
dear, I think you must look a little more strictly
after Janet. She grows very careless; this bread
is decidedly sour, the ham is half cooked, and worse
than all, breakfast is ten minutes too late.”
Mary’s quiet reply, that she
would “endeavour to have it right another time,”
was quite satisfactory; pleasant remarks followed,
and Arthur left home with a cheerful good morning.
Another breakfast time arrived.
Mary’s own personal attention had secured sweet
bread, and she had risen half an hour earlier than
usual to insure that all was done properly and in season.
Punctually the well prepared dishes
were placed upon the table, again Arthur’s plate
was well filled, and, to do him justice, its contents
were eaten with keen relish; but no look or word of
approval was given to show that he understood and appreciated
the effort which had been made to meet his wishes.
All was right, and therefore there
was nothing to say. To some this might have been
satisfactory, but not to Mary. She longed for
a word or smile to show that she had given pleasure.
But it is not to be supposed that
all these petty causes of complaint were on one side.
Arthur often felt grieved and somewhat irritated by
Mary’s altered manner or moody silence, showing
that he had offended in ways unknown to himself; and
there were also times when her ridicule of his somewhat
uncultivated taste granted harshly on his feelings.
Her continued dislike to the “dear old place”
was another source of regret; and before the first
year of married life had expired, feelings had sometimes
been busy in both their hearts which they would have
shuddered to have confessed even to themselves.
Winter and spring had passed away,
and summer was again present with its birds and flowers.
Mary was in her garden one lovely afternoon arranging
some favourite plants, when her attention was attracted
to a small cart laden with some strange old-fashioned-looking
furniture, which had stopped at their gate. She
at first supposed that the driver wished to inquire
the way, but to her surprise he carefully lifted a
large easy-chair, covered with leather and thickly
studded with brass nails, from the wagon, and brought
it toward the house, bowing respectfully as he approached
her, and inquiring where she wished to have it put.
“There is some mistake,”
said Mary; “these things are not for us.”
“Mr. Hartwell sent them here,
ma’am,” was the reply; “and here
is a bit of a note for your leddyship.”
Mary received the proffered slip of
paper, and hastily read the following lines:—
“You will be pleased, dear Mary,
to find that I have at length discovered the purchaser
of my mother’s easy-chair, and the old clock
which formerly stood in our family sitting-room, and
have bought them of him for a moderate price.
They are valuable to me as mementos of my boyish days,
and you will value them for my sake.”
But Mary had a great dislike to old
clocks, and leather-bottomed chairs, and she was little
disposed to value them even for Arthur’s sake.
She, however, directed the man where to place them,
and returned to the employment which he had interrupted.
Arthur’s business demanded his attention until
a late hour that evening, and he had said when he
left home that he should take tea in the city.
Mary retired to rest before his return, and nothing
was said concerning the old furniture until the following
morning.
Indeed, it seemed so perfectly worthless
to Mary, that the recollection of it had passed from
her mind; but it was recalled by the sudden inquiry
of her husband as he finished dressing and prepared
to go down stairs.
“Oh, Mary, dear, where did you
have the old chair and clock placed? Was I not
fortunate to find them?”
“Very,” replied Mary,
with forced interest; “although I hardly know
what you will do with them. I had them put in
the shed for the present.”
“In the shed!” exclaimed
Arthur; “but you are right, Mary, they need
a little rubbing off; please to let Janet attend to
them this morning, and I will show you the very places
where they used to stand in the parlour. How
delighted I shall be to see the old clock in its accustomed
corner, and to seat myself in the very chair where
I have so often sat with my dear mother!”
Mary uttered an involuntary, exclamation of horror.
“Why, Arthur, you do not really
intend to place those hideous old things in our parlour?”
“Certainly I do. I see
nothing hideous in them. They are worth all our
fashionable furniture put together. What is your
objection to them, Mary?”
“I have every objection to them,”
was her almost indignant reply. “They would
form the most ludicrous contrast to the rest of our
furniture.”
“I see nothing ludicrous or
improper in putting them in their old places,”
said Arthur, warmly. “They are dear to me
as having belonged to my parents and I cannot see
why you should wish to deny me the pleasure of having
them where I can enjoy the recollections which they
recall.”
“Put them in the garret, or
in your own little room where you keep your books,
if you like,” answered Mary; “but if you
have any regard to my feelings, you will keep them
out of my sight. I think the sacrifice which
I make in living in this old-fashioned place is enough,
without requiring me to ornament my parlour with furniture
which was in use before I was born. However, I
do not expect much consideration for my opinions and
tastes;” and, overpowered with a mixed feeling
of indignation and regret for the warmth with which
she had spoken, Mary burst into tears.
“You have certainly showed little
regard for my feelings,” was Arthur’s
irritated reply; “and perhaps, I may also say
with truth, what your words imply; I have little reason
to expect regard and consideration;” and hastily
leaving the room, he was on his way to his office
before Mary had composed herself sufficiently to descend
to the breakfast room.
“Has Mr. Hartwell breakfasted?”
she inquired, with surprise, as she saw the solitary
cup and plate which Janet had placed for her.
“He took no breakfast, ma’am.
I think he was in great haste to reach the office.”
“He has a great deal to attend
to, just now,” replied her mistress, unwilling
that Janet should suspect the truth; but as soon as
the girl left the room, her excited feelings again
found vent in tears.
Bitterly did she regret what had passed.
It was the first time that harsh words had been uttered
by either and they seemed to have lifted the veil
which had long been drawn over thoughts and feelings
which had tended to dissimilarity and separation.
The year passed in rapid review before
her, and she felt that there was a great and fearful
change, the cause of which she could not define, for
she had no distinct charges to bring against Arthur,
and as yet, she attached little blame to herself.
The unkind manner in which she had spoken that morning,
was indeed regretted; but this seemed the only error.
It was certainly unreasonable in Arthur to expect
her to yield willingly to such strange whim.
But he no longer loved her, she was
sure of this; and proof after proof of his inattention
to her wishes, and neglect of her feelings, came to
her mind until she was almost overwhelmed with the
view of her own misery, which imagination thus placed
before her.
And this was the anniversary of their
marriage! One short year before and they had
exchanged those mutual vows which then appeared unchangeable.
How soon happiness had fled! And to think that
this climax of their troubles should happen upon this
very day, which ought to have been consecrated to
tender remembrances!—this was the hardest
thought of all; but probably, Arthur did not even remember
the day. As these and similar thoughts passed
through Mary’s mind, her tears redoubled, and
fearful that Janet would surprise her in this situation,
she rose hastily to go to her own room. In doing
this her eye suddenly rested upon a small parcel addressed
to herself, which lay upon her little work-table,
and taking it in her hand she passed quickly up the
stairs, just in time to avoid the scrutinizing eye
of Janet, who, shrewdly suspecting that something
was wrong, had resolved to be uncommonly attentive
to her young mistress, in the hope of discovering
the cause of the trouble.
Mary locked the door of her own apartment,
and observing that the address on the package was
in Arthur’s handwriting, she hastily tore off
the envelope, discovering a beautiful edition of a
volume of poems for which she had expressed a wish—unheeded
and unheard, as she deemed it—some days
before. Her own name and that of her husband
were written upon the blank leaf, and the date showed
that it was designed as a gift for this very day;
a proof that he remembered the anniversary which she
had supposed so entirely forgotten.
It was but a trifling attention—one
of those pleasant little patches of blue sky which
we sometimes see when the remainder of the heavens
is covered with clouds—but it produced an
entire revulsion of feeling. A flood of gentle
and tender emotions filled the heart of the young
wife; the faults of her husband now appeared to her
as nothing, while his many virtues stood out in bold
relief; she, alone, had been to blame in the little
difficulties which had sprung up between them, for
a playful remonstrance on her part would, no doubt,
have dispelled the coldness of manner which had sometimes
troubled her, and induced him to pay those little attentions
which her heart craved. He had always, in every
important matter, been very, very kind to her, and
how often she had opposed his wishes and laughed at
his opinions!
But it was not yet too late; she would
regain the place in his affections which she still
feared she had forfeited; and with the childish, impulsive
eagerness which marked her character, Mary hastened
to the shed, and summoning Janet to her assistance,
was soon busily at work on the old furniture, which,
an hour ago, she had so much despised. The old
clock-case soon shone with an unequalled polish, and
the chair (sic) seeemed to have renewed its youth.
But where should they be placed? for Arthur had left
the house without designating the spot where they
had formerly stood.
“It would be so delightful to
have them just where he wished, before he comes home!”
thought Mary, and it was with real joy that she turned
to receive the greeting of a worthy old lady, who was
one of the nearest neighbours, and having lived on
the same place for the last forty years, had undoubtedly
been well acquainted with the old chair and clock,
and could tell the very place where they ought to
stand.
This proved to be the case. The
lady was quite delighted to meet such old friends,
and assisted Mary in arranging them with the utmost
pleasure.
“There, dear,” she exclaimed,
when all was completed, “that is exactly right.
It seems to me I can almost see my old friend, Mrs.
Hartwell, in her favourite chair, with her pretty little
boy, your husband that is now, by her side. Poor
child! it was such a sad loss to him when she died;
I am glad he has found such a good wife; it is not
every one who thinks so much of their husband’s
feelings as you do, my dear.”
Mary blushed a little at this somewhat
ill-deserved praise, but thanked her worthy visiter,
for her kindness, and exerted herself so successfully
to make her long call agreeable, that the good lady
went home with the firm impression that “’Arthur
Hartwell had got one of the best wives in the country.”
The hours seemed long until the usual
time for Arthur’s arrival; and with almost trembling
eagerness Mary heard his step in the entry. Her
tremulous but Pleasant “good evening,”
met with rather a cold return, but she was prepared
for this, and was not discouraged. Tea was on
the table, and they sat down. Arthur’s taste
had been scrupulously consulted, and the effort to
please did not, as was too often the case, pass unnoticed.
From a desire to break the somewhat
awkward silence, or from some other motive, he praised
each favourite dish, and declared he had seldom eaten
so good a supper.
Rising from table, they proceeded
as usual to the parlour; and now Mary was amply rewarded
for the sacrifice of her own taste, if sacrifice it
could be called, by the surprise and pleasure visible
in her husband’s countenance as he looked around,
and by the affectionate kiss which he imprinted upon
her cheek.
“And you will forgive my hasty
words, will you not?” Mary whispered softly
as he bent his head to hers.
“They will never again be remembered,”
was the reply; “and I have also much to ask
your forgiveness for, Mary, for I have thought much
and deeply, to-day, dearest, and I find that I have
been very deficient in many of the most essential
qualities of a husband. But let us sit down together
in this old chair, which with me is so strongly associated
with the memory of my dear mother, that it seems as
if her spirit must be near to bless us; and we will
review the past year a little, and you will let me
peep into your heart, and give me a clearer insight
into its feelings and wants.”
A long and free conversation followed,
in which the husband and wife gained more real knowledge
of each other’s characters than they had obtained
in the whole of their previous acquaintance. All
coldness and doubt was dispelled, and they felt that
they loved more tenderly and truly than ever before.
“And now, dearest, we will sum
up the lesson which we are to remember,” said
Arthur, playfully, as the lateness of the hour reminded
them that the evening had passed unheeded away. “I
am to think more of trifles, and you are—”
“To think less”
added Mary, smilingly. “Let us see who will
remember their lesson the best.”