Next day the morning hours seemed
to pass very slowly at M. Pelet’s; I wanted
the afternoon to come that I might go again to the
neighbouring pensionnat and give my first lesson within
its pleasant precincts; for pleasant they appeared
to me. At noon the hour of recreation arrived;
at one o’clock we had lunch; this got on the
time, and at last St. Gudule’s deep bell, tolling
slowly two, marked the moment for which I had been
waiting.
At the foot of the narrow back-stairs
that descended from my room, I met M. Pelet.
“Comme vous avez l’air
rayonnant!” said he. “Je ne vous
ai jamais vu aussi gai. Que s’est-il
donc passe?”
“Apparemment que j’aime les changements,”
replied I.
“Ah! je comprends—c’est
cela-soyez sage seulement. Vous etes bien jeune—trop
jeune pour le role que vous allez jouer; il faut
prendre garde—savez-vous?”
“Mais quel danger y a-t-il?”
“Je n’en sais rien—ne
vous laissez pas aller a de vives impressions—voila
tout.”
I laughed: a sentiment of exquisite
pleasure played over my nerves at the thought that
“vives impressions” were likely to be
created; it was the deadness, the sameness of life’s
daily ongoings that had hitherto been my bane; my
blouse-clad “eleves” in the boys’
seminary never stirred in me any “vives impressions”
except it might be occasionally some of anger.
I broke from M. Pelet, and as I strode down the passage
he followed me with one of his laughs—a
very French, rakish, mocking sound.
Again I stood at the neighbouring
door, and soon was re-admitted into the cheerful passage
with its clear dove-colour imitation marble walls.
I followed the portress, and descending a step, and
making a turn, I found myself in a sort of corridor;
a side-door opened, Mdlle. Reuter’s little
figure, as graceful as it was plump, appeared.
I could now see her dress in full daylight; a neat,
simple mousseline-laine gown fitted her compact round
shape to perfection—delicate little collar
and manchettes of lace, trim Parisian brodequins showed
her neck, wrists, and feet, to complete advantage;
but how grave was her face as she came suddenly upon
me! Solicitude and business were in her eye
—on her forehead; she looked almost stern.
Her “Bon jour, monsieur,” was quite polite,
but so orderly, so commonplace, it spread directly
a cool, damp towel over my “vives impressions.”
The servant turned back when her mistress appeared,
and I walked slowly along the corridor, side by side
with Mdlle. Reuter.
“Monsieur will give a lesson
in the first class to-day,” said she; “dictation
or reading will perhaps be the best thing to begin
with, for those are the easiest forms of communicating
instruction in a foreign language; and, at the first,
a master naturally feels a little unsettled.”
She was quite right, as I had found
from experience; it only remained for me to acquiesce.
We proceeded now in silence. The corridor terminated
in a hall, large, lofty, and square; a glass door
on one side showed within a long narrow refectory,
with tables, an armoire, and two lamps; it was empty;
large glass doors, in front, opened on the playground
and garden; a broad staircase ascended spirally on
the opposite side; the remaining wall showed a pair
of great folding-doors, now closed, and admitting:
doubtless, to the classes.
Mdlle. Reuter turned her eye
laterally on me, to ascertain, probably, whether I
was collected enough to be ushered into her sanctum
sanctorum. I suppose she judged me to be in a
tolerable state of self-government, for she opened
the door, and I followed her through. A rustling
sound of uprising greeted our entrance; without looking
to the right or left, I walked straight up the lane
between two sets of benches and desks, and took possession
of the empty chair and isolated desk raised on an estrade,
of one step high, so as to command one division; the
other division being under the surveillance of a maitresse
similarly elevated. At the back of the estrade,
and attached to a moveable partition dividing this
schoolroom from another beyond, was a large tableau
of wood painted black and varnished; a thick crayon
of white chalk lay on my desk for the convenience
of elucidating any grammatical or verbal obscurity
which might occur in my lessons by writing it upon
the tableau; a wet sponge appeared beside the chalk,
to enable me to efface the marks when they had served
the purpose intended.
I carefully and deliberately made
these observations before allowing myself to take
one glance at the benches before me; having handled
the crayon, looked back at the tableau, fingered the
sponge in order to ascertain that it was in a right
state of moisture, I found myself cool enough to admit
of looking calmly up and gazing deliberately round
me.
And first I observed that Mdlle.
Reuter had already glided away, she was nowhere visible;
a maitresse or teacher, the one who occupied the corresponding
estrade to my own, alone remained to keep guard over
me; she was a little in the shade, and, with my short
sight, I could only see that she was of a thin bony
figure and rather tallowy complexion, and that her
attitude, as she sat, partook equally of listlessness
and affectation. More obvious, more prominent,
shone on by the full light of the large window, were
the occupants of the benches just before me, of whom
some were girls of fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, some
young women from eighteen (as it appeared to me) up
to twenty; the most modest attire, the simplest fashion
of wearing the hair, were apparent in all; and good
features, ruddy, blooming complexions, large and brilliant
eyes, forms full, even to solidity, seemed to abound.
I did not bear the first view like a stoic; I was dazzled,
my eyes fell, and in a voice somewhat too low I murmured—
“Prenez vos cahiers de dictee, mesdemoiselles.”
Not so had I bid the boys at Pelet’s
take their reading-books. A rustle followed,
and an opening of desks; behind the lifted lids which
momentarily screened the heads bent down to search
for exercise-books, I heard tittering and whispers.
“Eulalie, je suis prete a pamer
de rire,” observed one.
“Comme il a rougi en parlant!”
“Oui, c’est un veritable blanc-bec.”
“Tais-toi, Hortense—il nous ecoute.”
And now the lids sank and the heads
reappeared; I had marked three, the whisperers, and
I did not scruple to take a very steady look at them
as they emerged from their temporary eclipse.
It is astonishing what ease and courage their little
phrases of flippancy had given me; the idea by which
I had been awed was that the youthful beings before
me, with their dark nun-like robes and softly braided
hair, were a kind of half-angels. The light
titter, the giddy whisper, had already in some measure
relieved my mind of that fond and oppressive fancy.
The three I allude to were just in
front, within half a yard of my estrade, and were
among the most womanly-looking present. Their
names I knew afterwards, and may as well mention now;
they were Eulalie, Hortense, Caroline. Eulalie
was tall, and very finely shaped: she was fair,
and her features were those of a Low Country Madonna;
many a “figure de Vierge” have I seen in
Dutch pictures exactly resembling hers; there were
no angles in her shape or in her face, all was curve
and roundness—neither thought, sentiment,
nor passion disturbed by line or flush the equality
of her pale, clear skin; her noble bust heaved with
her regular breathing, her eyes moved a little—by
these evidences of life alone could I have distinguished
her from some large handsome figure moulded in wax.
Hortense was of middle size and stout, her form was
ungraceful, her face striking, more alive and brilliant
than Eulalie’s, her hair was dark brown, her
complexion richly coloured; there were frolic and
mischief in her eye: consistency and good sense
she might possess, but none of her features betokened
those qualities.
Caroline was little, though evidently
full grown; raven-black hair, very dark eyes, absolutely
regular features, with a colourless olive complexion,
clear as to the face and sallow about the neck, formed
in her that assemblage of points whose union many
persons regard as the perfection of beauty. How,
with the tintless pallor of her skin and the classic
straightness of her lineaments, she managed to look
sensual, I don’t know. I think her lips
and eyes contrived the affair between them, and the
result left no uncertainty on the beholder’s
mind. She was sensual now, and in ten years’
time she would be coarse—promise plain
was written in her face of much future folly.
If I looked at these girls with little
scruple, they looked at me with still less.
Eulalie raised her unmoved eye to mine, and seemed
to expect, passively but securely, an impromptu tribute
to her majestic charms. Hortense regarded me
boldly, and giggled at the same time, while she said,
with an air of impudent freedom—
“Dictez-nous quelquechose de
facile pour commencer, monsieur.”
Caroline shook her loose ringlets
of abundant but somewhat coarse hair over her rolling
black eyes; parting her lips, as full as those of
a hot-blooded Maroon, she showed her well-set teeth
sparkling between them, and treated me at the same
time to a smile “de sa facon.” Beautiful
as Pauline Borghese, she looked at the moment scarcely
purer than Lucrece de Borgia. Caroline was of
noble family. I heard her lady-mother’s
character afterwards, and then I ceased to wonder
at the precocious accomplishments of the daughter.
These three, I at once saw, deemed themselves the
queens of the school, and conceived that by their splendour
they threw all the rest into the shade. In less
than five minutes they had thus revealed to me their
characters, and in less than five minutes I had buckled
on a breast-plate of steely indifference, and let
down a visor of impassible austerity.
“Take your pens and commence
writing,” said I, in as dry and trite a voice
as if I had been addressing only Jules Vanderkelkov
and Co.
The dictee now commenced. My
three belles interrupted me perpetually with little
silly questions and uncalled-for remarks, to some
of which I made no answer, and to others replied very
quietly and briefly. “Comment dit-on point
et virgule en Anglais, monsieur?”
“Semi-colon, mademoiselle.”
“Semi-collong? Ah, comme c’est
drole!” (giggle.)
“J’ai une si mauvaise plume—impossible
d’ecrire!”
“Mais, monsieur—je ne sais pas suivre—vous
allez si vite.”
“Je n’ai rien compris, moi!”
Here a general murmur arose, and the
teacher, opening her lips for the first time, ejaculated—
“Silence, mesdemoiselles!”
No silence followed—on
the contrary, the three ladies in front began to talk
more loudly.
“C’est si difficile, l’Anglais!”
“Je deteste la dictee.”
“Quel ennui d’ecrire quelquechose que
l’on ne comprend pas!”
Some of those behind laughed:
a degree of confusion began to pervade the class;
it was necessary to take prompt measures.
“Donnez-moi votre cahier,”
said I to Eulalie in an abrupt tone; and bending over,
I took it before she had time to give it.
“Et vous, mademoiselle-donnez-moi
le votre,” continued I, more mildly, addressing
a little pale, plain looking girl who sat in the first
row of the other division, and whom I had remarked
as being at once the ugliest and the most attentive
in the room; she rose up, walked over to me, and delivered
her book with a grave, modest curtsey. I glanced
over the two dictations; Eulalie’s was slurred,
blotted, and full of silly mistakes—Sylvie’s
(such was the name of the ugly little girl) was clearly
written, it contained no error against sense, and
but few faults of orthography. I coolly read
aloud both exercises, marking the faults—then
I looked at Eulalie:
“C’est honteux!”
said I, and I deliberately tore her dictation in
four parts, and presented her with the fragments.
I returned Sylvie her book with a smile, saying—
“C’est bien—je suis content
de vous.”
Sylvie looked calmly pleased, Eulalie
swelled like an incensed turkey, but the mutiny was
quelled: the conceited coquetry and futile flirtation
of the first bench were exchanged for a taciturn sullenness,
much more convenient to me, and the rest of my lesson
passed without interruption.
A bell clanging out in the yard announced
the moment for the cessation of school labours.
I heard our own bell at the same time, and that of
a certain public college immediately after. Order
dissolved instantly; up started every pupil, I hastened
to seize my hat, bow to the maitresse, and quit the
room before the tide of externats should pour from
the inner class, where I knew near a hundred were
prisoned, and whose rising tumult I already heard.
I had scarcely crossed the hall and
gained the corridor, when Mdlle. Reuter came
again upon me.
“Step in here a moment,”
said she, and she held open the door of the side room
from whence she had issued on my arrival; it was a
salleAmanger, as appeared from the beaufet
and the armoire vitree, filled with glass and china,
which formed part of its furniture. Ere she
had closed the door on me and herself, the corridor
was already filled with day-pupils, tearing down their
cloaks, bonnets, and cabas from the wooden pegs on
which they were suspended; the shrill voice of a maitresse
was heard at intervals vainly endeavouring to enforce
some sort of order; vainly, I say: discipline
there was none in these rough ranks, and yet this
was considered one of the best-conducted schools in
Brussels.
“Well, you have given your first
lesson,” began Mdlle. Reuter in the most
calm, equable voice, as though quite unconscious of
the chaos from which we were separated only by a single
wall.
“Were you satisfied with your
pupils, or did any circumstance in their conduct give
you cause for complaint? Conceal nothing from
me, repose in me entire confidence.”
Happily, I felt in myself complete
power to manage my pupils without aid; the enchantment,
the golden haze which had dazzled my perspicuity at
first, had been a good deal dissipated. I cannot
say I was chagrined or downcast by the contrast which
the reality of a pensionnat de demoiselles presented
to my vague ideal of the same community; I was only
enlightened and amused; consequently, I felt in no
disposition to complain to Mdlle. Reuter, and
I received her considerate invitation to confidence
with a smile.
“A thousand thanks, mademoiselle,
all has gone very smoothly.”
She looked more than doubtful.
“Et les trois demoiselles du premier banc?”
said she.
“Ah! tout va au mieux!”
was my answer, and Mdlle. Reuter ceased to question
me; but her eye—not large, not brilliant,
not melting, or kindling, but astute, penetrating,
practical, showed she was even with me; it let out
a momentary gleam, which said plainly, “Be as
close as you like, I am not dependent on your candour;
what you would conceal I already know.”
By a transition so quiet as to be
scarcely perceptible, the directress’s manner
changed; the anxious business-air passed from her
face, and she began chatting about the weather and
the town, and asking in neighbourly wise after M.
and Madame Pelet. I answered all her little
questions; she prolonged her talk, I went on following
its many little windings; she sat so long, said so
much, varied so often the topics of discourse, that
it was not difficult to perceive she had a particular
aim in thus detaining me. Her mere words could
have afforded no clue to this aim, but her countenance
aided; while her lips uttered only affable commonplaces,
her eyes reverted continually to my face. Her
glances were not given in full, but out of the corners,
so quietly, so stealthily, yet I think I lost not
one. I watched her as keenly as she watched
me; I perceived soon that she was feeling after my
real character; she was searching for salient points,
and weak; points, and eccentric points; she was applying
now this test, now that, hoping in the end to find
some chink, some niche, where she could put in her
little firm foot and stand upon my neck—mistress
of my nature, Do not mistake me, reader, it was no
amorous influence she wished to gain—at
that time it was only the power of the politician
to which she aspired; I was now installed as a professor
in her establishment, and she wanted to know where
her mind was superior to mine—by what feeling
or opinion she could lead me.
I enjoyed the game much, and did not
hasten its conclusion; sometimes I gave her hopes,
beginning a sentence rather weakly, when her shrewd
eye would light up—she thought she had me;
having led her a little way, I delighted to turn round
and finish with sound, hard sense, whereat her countenance
would fall. At last a servant entered to announce
dinner; the conflict being thus necessarily terminated,
we parted without having gained any advantage on either
side: Mdlle. Reuter had not even given me
an opportunity of attacking her with feeling, and
I had managed to baffle her little schemes of craft.
It was a regular drawn battle. I again held
out my hand when I left the room, she gave me hers;
it was a small and white hand, but how cool!
I met her eye too in full—obliging her
to give me a straightforward look; this last test
went against me: it left her as it found her
—moderate, temperate, tranquil; me it disappointed.
“I am growing wiser,”
thought I, as I walked back to M. Pelet’s.
“Look at this little woman; is she like the women
of novelists and romancers? To read of female
character as depicted in Poetry and Fiction, one would
think it was made up of sentiment, either for good
or bad—here is a specimen, and a most sensible
and respectable specimen, too, whose staple ingredient
is abstract reason. No Talleyrand was ever more
passionless than Zoraide Reuter!” So I thought
then; I found afterwards that blunt susceptibilities
are very consistent with strong propensities.