I can see now his rather pallid face,
and the unfamiliar sombre fire that had come into
his eyes. I see him very vividly to-night.
I sit recalling his words, his tones, and last evening’s
Westminster Gazette still lies on my sofa,
containing the notice of his death. At lunch to-day
the club was busy with his death. We talked of
nothing else.
They found his body very early yesterday
morning in a deep excavation near East Kensington
Station. It is one of two shafts that have been
made in connection with an extension of the railway
southward. It is protected from the intrusion
of the public by a hoarding upon the high road, in
which a small doorway has been cut for the convenience
of some of the workmen who live in that direction.
The doorway was left unfastened through a misunderstanding
between two gangers, and through it he made his way…
My mind is darkened with questions and riddles.
It would seem he walked all the way
from the House that night—he has frequently
walked home during the past Session—and
so it is I figure his dark form coming along the late
and empty streets, wrapped up, intent. And then
did the pale electric lights near the station cheat
the rough planking into a semblance of white?
Did that fatal unfastened door awaken some memory?
Was there, after all, ever any green
door in the wall at all?
I do not know. I have told his
story as he told it to me. There are times when
I believe that Wallace was no more than the victim
of the coincidence between a rare but not unprecedented
type of hallucination and a careless trap, but that
indeed is not my profoundest belief. You may think
me superstitious, if you will, and foolish; but, indeed,
I am more than half convinced that he had, in truth,
an abnormal gift, and a sense, something—I
know not what—–that in the guise of
wall and door offered him an outlet, a secret and
peculiar passage of escape into another and altogether
more beautiful world. At any rate, you will say,
it betrayed him in the end. But did it betray
him? There you touch the inmost mystery of these
dreamers, these men of vision and the imagination.
We see our world fair and common, the hoarding and
the pit. By our daylight standard he walked out
of security into darkness, danger, and death.
But did he see like that?