In the third year of their life on
St. Croix, Rachael discovered that Peter Lytton was
dissatisfied with Hamilton, and retained him to his
own detriment, out of sympathy for herself and her
children. From that time she had few tranquil
moments. It was as if, like the timid in the
hurricane season, she sat constantly with ears strained
for that first loud roar in the east. She realized
then that the sort of upheaval which shatters one’s
economic life is but the precursor of other upheavals,
and she thought on the unknown future until her strong
soul was faint again.
Hamilton was one of those men whose
gifts are ruined by their impulses, in whom the cultivation
of sober judgement is interrupted by the excesses
of a too sanguine temperament. He was honourable,
and always willing to admit his mistakes, but years
and repeated failure did little toward balancing his
faults and virtues. In time he wore out the patience
of even those who loved and admired him. His wife
remained his one loyal and unswerving friend, but
her part in his life was near its finish. The
day came when Peter Lytton, exasperated once too often,
after an ill-considered sale of valuable stock, let
fly his temper, and further acceptance of his favour
was out of the question. Hamilton, after a scene
with his wife, in which his agony and remorse quickened
all the finest passions in her own nature, sailed for
the Island of St. Vincent, in the hope of finding
employment with one of his former business connections.
He had no choice but to leave his wife and children
dependent upon her relatives until he could send for
them; and a week later Rachael was forced to move
to Peter Lytton’s.
Her brother-in-law’s house was
very large. She was given an upstairs wing of
it and treated with much consideration, but this final
ignominy broke her haughty spirit, and she lost interest
in herself. She was thankful that her children
were not to grow up in want, that Alexander was able
to continue his studies with Hugh Knox. He was
beyond her now in everything but French, in which
they read and talked together daily. She also
discussed constantly with him those heroes of history
distinguished not only for great achievements, but
for sternest honour. She dreamed of his future
greatness, and sometimes of her part in it. But
her inner life was swathed like a mummy.
To Alexander the change would have
been welcome had he understood his mother less.
But the ordinary bright boy of nine is acute and observing,
and this boy of Rachael’s, with his extraordinary
intuitions, his unboyish brain, his sympathetic and
profound affection for his mother, felt with her and
criticised his father severely. To him failure
was incomprehensible, then, as later, for self-confidence
and indomitability were parts of his equipment; and
that a man of his father’s age and experience,
to say nothing of his education and intellect, should
so fail in the common relation of life, and break
the heart and pride of the uncommonest of women, filled
him with a deep disappointment, which, no doubt, was
the first step toward the early loss of certain illusions.
Otherwise his life was vastly improved.
He soon became intimate with boys of neighbouring
estates, Edward and Thomas Stevens, and Benjamin Yard,
and for a time they all studied together under Hugh
Knox. At first there was discord, for Alexander
would have led a host of cherubims or had naught to
do with them, and these boys were clever and spirited.
There were rights of word and fist in the lee of Mr.
Lytton’s barn, where interference was unlikely;
but the three succumbed speedily, not alone to the
powerful magnetism in little Hamilton’s mind,
and to his active fists, but because he invariably
excited passionate attachment, unless he encountered
jealous hate. When his popularity with these boys
was established they adored the very blaze of his temper,
and when he formed them into a soldier company and
marched them up and down the palm avenue for a morning
at a time, they never murmured, although they were
like to die of the heat and unaccustomed exertion.
Neddy Stevens, who resembled him somewhat in face,
was the closest of these boyhood friends.
Alexander was a great favourite with
Mr. Lytton, who took him to ride every morning; Mrs.
Lytton preferred James, who was a comfortable child
to nurse; but Mrs. Mitchell was the declared slave
of her lively nephew, and sent her coach for him on
Saturday mornings. As for Hugh Knox, he never
ceased to whittle at the boy’s ambition and point
it toward a great place in modern letters. Had
he been born with less sound sense and a less watchful
mother, it is appalling to think what a brat he would
have been; but as it was, the spoiling but fostered
a self-confidence which was half the battle in after
years.
Hamilton never returned. His
letters to his wife spoke always of the happiness
of their final reunion, of belief in the future.
His brothers had sent him money, and he hoped they
would help him to recover his fortunes. But two
years passed and he was still existing on a small
salary, his hopes and his impassioned tenderness were
stereotyped. Rachael’s experience with
Hamilton had developed her insight. She knew
that man requires woman to look after her own fuel.
If she cannot, he may carry through life the perfume
of a sentiment, and a tender regret, but it grows
easy and more easy to live without her. It was
a long while before she forced her penetrating vision
round to the certainty that she never should see Hamilton
again, and then she realized how strong hope had been,
that her interest in herself was not dead, that her
love must remain quick through interminable years
of monotony and humiliation. For a time she was
so alive that she went close to killing herself, but
she fought it out as she had fought through other
desperate crises, and wrenched herself free of her
youth, to live for the time when her son’s genius
should lift him so high among the immortals that his
birth would matter as little as her own hours of agony.
But the strength that carried her triumphantly through
that battle was fed by the last of her vitality, and
it was not long before she knew that she must die.
Alexander knew it first. The
change in his mother was so sudden, the earthen hue
of her white skin, the dimming of her splendid eyes,
spoke so unmistakably of some strange collapse of
the vital forces, that it seemed to the boy who worshipped
her as if all the noises of the Universe were shrieking
his anguish. At the same time he fought for an
impassive exterior, then bolted from the house and
rode across the Island for a doctor. The man
came, prescribed for a megrim, and Alexander did not
call him again; nor did he mention his mother’s
condition to the rest of the family. She was in
the habit of remaining in her rooms for weeks at a
time, and she had her own attendants. Mrs. Lytton
was an invalid, and Peter Lytton, while ready to give
of his bounty to his wife’s sister, had too
little in common with Rachael to seek her companionship.
Alexander felt the presence of death too surely to
hope, and was determined to have his mother to himself
during the time that remained. He confided in
Hugh Knox, then barely left the apartments.
Just before her collapse Rachael was
still a beautiful woman. She was only thirty-two
when she died. Her face, except when she forced
her brain to activity, was sad and worn, but the mobile
beauty of the features was unimpaired, and her eyes
were luminous, even at their darkest. Her head
was always proudly erect, and nature had given her
a grace and a dash which survived broken fortunes
and the death of her coquetry. No doubt this
is the impression of her which Alexander carried through
life, for those last two months passed to the sound
of falling ruins, on which he was too sensible to
dwell when they had gone into the control of his will.
After she had admitted to Alexander
that she understood her condition, they seldom alluded
to the subject, although their conversation was as
rarely impersonal. The house stood high, and Rachael’s
windows commanded one of the most charming views on
the Island. Below was the green valley, with
the turbaned women moving among the cane, then the
long white road with its splendid setting of royal
palms, winding past a hill with groves of palms, marble
fountains and statues, terraces covered with hibiscus
and orchid, and another Great House on its summit.
Far to the right, through an opening in the hills,
was a glimpse of the sea.
Rachael lay on a couch in a little
balcony during much of the soft winter day, and talked
to Alexander of her mother and her youth, finally
of his father, touching lightly on the almost forgotten
episode with Levine. All that she did not say
his creative brain divined, and when she told him
what he had long suspected, that his mother’s
name was unknown to the Hamiltons of Grange, he accepted
the fact as but one more obstacle to be overthrown
in the battle with life which he had long known he
was to fight unaided. To criticise his mother
never occurred to him; her control of his heart and
imagination was too absolute. His only regret
was that she could not live until he was able to justify
her. The audacity and boldness of his nature
were stimulated by the prospect of this sharp battle
with the world’s most cherished convention, and
he was fully aware of all that he owed to his mother.
When he told her this she said:—
“I regret nothing, even though
it has brought me to this. In the first place,
it is not in me to do anything so futile. In the
second place, I have been permitted to live in every
part of my nature, and how many women can say that?
In the third, you are in the world, and if I could
live I should see you the honoured of all men.
I die with regret because you need me for many years
to come, and I have suffered so much that I never
could suffer again. Remember always that you are
to be a great man, not merely a successful one.
Your mind and your will are capable of all things.
Never try for the second best, and that means to put
your immediate personal desire aside when it encounters
one of the ideals of your time. Unless you identify
yourself with the great principles of the world you
will be a failure, because your mind is created in
harmony with them, and if you use it for smaller purposes
it will fail as surely as if it tried to lie or steal.
Your passions are violent, and you have a blackness
of hate in you which will ruin you or others according
to the control you acquire over it; so be warned.
But you never can fail through any of the ordinary
defects of character. You are too bold and independent
to lie, even if you had been born with any such disposition;
you are honourable and tactful, and there is as little
doubt of your fascination and your power over others.
But remember—use all these great forces
when your ambition is hottest, then you can stumble
upon no second place. As for your heart, it will
control your head sometimes, but your insatiable brain
will accomplish so much that it can afford to lose
occasionally; and the warmth of your nature will make
you so many friends, that I draw from it more strength
to die than from all your other gifts. Leave
this Island as soon as you can. Ah, if I could
give you but a few thousands to force the first doors!”
She died on the 25th of February,
1768. Her condition had been known for some days,
and her sisters had shed many tears, aghast and deeply
impressed at the tragic fate of this youngest, strangest,
and most gifted of their father’s children.
Unconsciously they had expected her to do something
extraordinary, and it was yet too soon to realize that
she had. His aunts had announced far and wide
that Alexander was the brightest boy on the Island,
but that a nation lay folded in his saucy audacious
brain they hardly could be expected to know.