A maiden’s
first romance
To this period of Modeste’s
eager rage for reading succeeded the exercise of a
strange faculty given to vigorous imaginations,—the
power, namely, of making herself an actor in a dream-existence;
of representing to her own mind the things desired,
with so vivid a conception that they seemed actually
to attain reality; in short, to enjoy by thought,—to
live out her years within her mind; to marry; to grow
old; to attend her own funeral like Charles V.; to
play within herself the comedy of life and, if need
be, that of death. Modeste was indeed playing,
but all alone, the comedy of Love. She fancied
herself adored to the summit of her wishes in many
an imagined phase of social life. Sometimes as
the heroine of a dark romance, she loved the executioner,
or the wretch who ended her days upon the scaffold,
or, like her sister, some Parisian youth without a
penny, whose struggles were all beneath a garret-roof.
Sometimes she was Ninon, scorning men amid continual
fetes; or some applauded actress, or gay adventuress,
exhausting in her own behalf the luck of Gil Blas,
or the triumphs of Pasta, Malibran, and Florine.
Then, weary of the horrors and excitements, she returned
to actual life. She married a notary, she ate
the plain brown bread of honest everyday life, she
saw herself a Madame Latournelle; she accepted a painful
existence, she bore all the trials of a struggle with
fortune. After that she went back to the romances:
she was loved for her beauty; a son of a peer of France,
an eccentric, artistic young man, divined her heart,
recognized the star which the genius of a De Stael
had planted on her brow. Her father returned,
possessing millions. With his permission, she
put her various lovers to certain tests (always carefully
guarding her own independence); she owned a magnificent
estate and castle, servants, horses, carriages, the
choicest of everything that luxury could bestow, and
kept her suitors uncertain until she was forty years
old, at which age she made her choice.
This edition of the Arabian Nights
in a single copy lasted nearly a year, and taught
Modeste the sense of satiety through thought.
She held her life too often in her hand, she said
to herself philosophically and with too real a bitterness,
too seriously, and too often, “Well, what is
it, after all?” not to have plunged to her waist
in the deep disgust which all men of genius feel when
they try to complete by intense toil the work to which
they have devoted themselves. Her youth and her
rich nature alone kept Modeste at this period of her
life from seeking to enter a cloister. But this
sense of satiety cast her, saturated as she still
was with Catholic spirituality, into the love of Good,
the infinite of heaven. She conceived of charity,
service to others, as the true occupation of life;
but she cowered in the gloomy dreariness of finding
in it no food for the fancy that lay crouching in
her heart like an insect at the bottom of a calyx.
Meanwhile she sat tranquilly sewing garments for the
children of the poor, and listening abstractedly to
the grumblings of Monsieur Latournelle when Dumay
held the thirteenth card or drew out his last trump.
Her religious faith drove Modeste
for a time into a singular track of thought.
She imagined that if she became sinless (speaking
ecclesiastically) she would attain to such a condition
of sanctity that God would hear her and accomplish
her desires. “Faith,” she thought,
“can move mountains; Christ has said so.
The Saviour led his apostle upon the waters of the
lake Tiberias; and I, all I ask of God is a husband
to love me; that is easier than walking upon the sea.”
She fasted through the next Lent, and did not commit
a single sin; then she said to herself that on a certain
day coming out of church she should meet a handsome
young man who was worthy of her, whom her mother would
accept, and who would fall madly in love with her.
When the day came on which she had, as it were, summoned
God to send her an angel, she was persistently followed
by a rather disgusting beggar; moreover, it rained
heavily, and not a single young man was in the streets.
On another occasion she went to walk on the jetty to
see the English travellers land; but each Englishman
had an Englishwoman, nearly as handsome as Modeste
herself, who saw no one at all resembling a wandering
Childe Harold. Tears overcame her, as she sat
down like Marius on the ruins of her imagination.
But on the day when she subpoenaed God for the third
time she firmly believed that the Elect of her dreams
was within the church, hiding, perhaps out of delicacy,
behind one of the pillars, round all of which she dragged
Madame Latournelle on a tour of inspection. After
this failure, she deposed the Deity from omnipotence.
Many were her conversations with the imaginary lover,
for whom she invented questions and answers, bestowing
upon him a great deal of wit and intelligence.
The high ambitions of her heart hidden
within these romances were the real explanation of
the prudent conduct which the good people who watched
over Modeste so much admired; they might have brought
her any number of young Althors or Vilquins, and she
would never have stooped to such clowns. She
wanted, purely and simply, a man of genius, —talent
she cared little for; just as a lawyer is of no account
to a girl who aims for an ambassador. Her only
desire for wealth was to cast it at the feet of her
idol. Indeed, the golden background of these
visions was far less rich than the treasury of her
own heart, filled with womanly delicacy; for its dominant
desire was to make some Tasso, some Milton, a Jean-Jacques
Rousseau, a Murat, a Christopher Columbus happy.
Commonplace miseries did not seriously
touch this youthful soul, who longed to extinguish
the fires of the martyrs ignored and rejected in their
own day. Sometimes she imagined balms of Gilead,
soothing melodies which might have allayed the savage
misanthropy of Rousseau. Or she fancied herself
the wife of Lord Byron; guessing intuitively his contempt
for the real, she made herself as fantastic as the
poetry of Manfred, and provided for his scepticism
by making him a Catholic. Modeste attributed
Moliere’s melancholy to the women of the seventeenth
century. “Why is there not some one woman,”
she asked herself, “loving, beautiful, and rich,
ready to stand beside each man of genius and be his
slave, like Lara, the mysterious page?” She had,
as the reader perceives, fully understood “il
pianto,” which the English poet chanted by the
mouth of his Gulmare. Modeste greatly admired
the behavior of the young Englishwoman who offered
herself to Crebillon, the son, who married her.
The story of Sterne and Eliza Draper was her life
and her happiness for several months. She made
herself ideally the heroine of a like romance, and
many a time she rehearsed in imagination the sublime
role of Eliza. The sensibility so charmingly
expressed in that delightful correspondence filled
her eyes with tears which, it is said, were lacking
in those of the wittiest of English writers.
Modeste existed for some time on a
comprehension, not only of the works, but of the characters
of her favorite authors,—Goldsmith, the
author of Obermann, Charles Nodier, Maturin. The
poorest and the most suffering among them were her
deities; she guessed their trials, initiated herself
into a destitution where the thoughts of genius brooded,
and poured upon it the treasures of her heart; she
fancied herself the giver of material comfort to these
great men, martyrs to their own faculty. This
noble compassion, this intuition of the struggles
of toilers, this worship of genius, are among the choicest
perceptions that flutter through the souls of women.
They are, in the first place, a secret between the
woman and God, for they are hidden; in them there
is nothing striking, nothing that gratifies the vanity,
—that powerful auxiliary to all action among
the French.
Out of this third period of the development
of her ideas, there came to Modeste a passionate desire
to penetrate to the heart of one of these abnormal
beings; to understand the working of the thoughts and
the hidden griefs of genius,—to know not
only what it wanted but what it was. At the period
when this story begins, these vagaries of fancy, these
excursions of her soul into the void, these feelers
put forth into the darkness of the future, the impatience
of an ungiven love to find its goal, the nobility
of all her thoughts of life, the decision of her mind
to suffer in a sphere of higher things rather than
flounder in the marshes of provincial life like her
mother, the pledge she had made to herself never to
fail in conduct, but to respect her father’s
hearth and bring it happiness,—all this
world of feeling and sentiment had lately come to
a climax and taken shape. Modeste wished to be
the friend and companion of a poet, an artist, a man
in some way superior to the crowd of men. But
she intended to choose him,—not to give
him her heart, her life, her infinite tenderness freed
from the trammels of passion, until she had carefully
and deeply studied him.
She began this pretty romance by simply
enjoying it. Profound tranquillity settled down
upon her soul. Her cheeks took on a soft color;
and she became the beautiful and noble image of Germany,
such as we have lately seen her, the glory of the
Chalet, the pride of Madame Latournelle and the Dumays.
Modeste was living a double existence. She performed
with humble, loving care all the minute duties of
the homely life at the Chalet, using them as a rein
to guide the poetry of her ideal life, like the Carthusian
monks who labor methodically on material things to
leave their souls the freer to develop in prayer.
All great minds have bound themselves to some form
of mechanical toil to obtain greater mastery of thought.
Spinosa ground glasses for spectacles; Bayle counted
the tiles on the roof; Montesquieu gardened.
The body being thus subdued, the soul could spread
its wings in all security.
Madame Mignon, reading her daughter’s
soul, was therefore right. Modeste loved; she
loved with that rare platonic love, so little understood,
the first illusion of a young girl, the most delicate
of all sentiments, a very dainty of the heart.
She drank deep draughts from the chalice of the unknown,
the vague, the visionary. She admired the blue
plumage of the bird that sings afar in the paradise
of young girls, which no hand can touch, no gun can
cover, as it flits across the sight; she loved those
magic colors, like sparkling jewels dazzling to the
eye, which youth can see, and never sees again when
Reality, the hideous hag, appears with witnesses accompanied
by the mayor. To live the very poetry of love
and not to see the lover—ah, what sweet
intoxication! what visionary rapture! a chimera with
flowing man and outspread wings!
The following is the puerile and even
silly event which decided the future life of this
young girl.
Modeste happened to see in a bookseller’s
window a lithographic portrait of one of her favorites,
Canalis. We all know what lies such pictures
tell,—being as they are the result of a
shameless speculation, which seizes upon the personality
of celebrated individuals as if their faces were public
property.
In this instance Canalis, sketched
in a Byronic pose, was offering to public admiration
his dark locks floating in the breeze, a bare throat,
and the unfathomable brow which every bard ought to
possess. Victor Hugo’s forehead will make
more persons shave their heads than the number of
incipient marshals ever killed by the glory of Napoleon.
This portrait of Canalis (poetic through mercantile
necessity) caught Modeste’s eye. The day
on which it caught her eye one of Arthez’s best
books happened to be published. We are compelled
to admit, though it may be to Modeste’s injury,
that she hesitated long between the illustrious poet
and the illustrious prose-writer. Which of these
celebrated men was free?—that was the question.
Modeste began by securing the co-operation
of Francoise Cochet, a maid taken from Havre and brought
back again by poor Bettina, whom Madame Mignon and
Madame Dumay now employed by the day, and who lived
in Havre. Modeste took her to her own room and
assured her that she would never cause her parents
any grief, never pass the bounds of a young girl’s
propriety, and that as to Francoise herself she would
be well provided for after the return of Monsieur
Mignon, on condition that she would do a certain service
and keep it an inviolable secret. What was it?
Why, a nothing—perfectly innocent.
All that Modeste wanted of her accomplice was to put
certain letters into the post at Havre and to bring
some back which would be directed to herself, Francoise
Cochet. The treaty concluded, Modeste wrote a
polite note to Dauriat, publisher of the poems of
Canalis, asking, in the interest of that great poet,
for some particulars about him, among others if he
were married. She requested the publisher to
address his answer to Mademoiselle Francoise, “poste
restante,” Havre.
Dauriat, incapable of taking the epistle
seriously, wrote a reply in presence of four or five
journalists who happened to be in his office at the
time, each of whom added his particular stroke of wit
to the production.
Mademoiselle,—Canalis (Baron
of), Constant Cys Melchior, member of the French
Academy, born in 1800, at Canalis (Correze), five
feet four inches in height, of good standing, vaccinated,
spotless birth, has given a substitute to the conscription,
enjoys perfect health, owns a small patrimonial
estate in the Correze, and wishes to marry, but
the lady must be rich.
He beareth per pale, gules an axe or,
sable three escallops
argent, surmounted by a baron’s
coronet; supporters, two larches,
vert. Motto: “Or et fer”
(no allusion to Ophir or auriferous).
The original Canalis, who went to the
Holy Land with the First Crusade, is cited in the
chronicles of Auvergne as being armed with an axe
on account of the family indigence, which to this day
weighs heavily on the race. This noble baron,
famous for discomfiting a vast number of infidels,
died, without “or” or “fer,”
as naked as a worm, near Jerusalem, on the plains of
Ascalon, ambulances not being then invented.
The chateau of Canalis (the domain yields
a few chestnuts)
consists of two dismantled towers, united
by a piece of wall
covered by a fine ivy, and is taxed at
twenty-two francs.
The undersigned (publisher) calls attention
to the fact that he pays ten thousand francs for
every volume of poetry written by Monsieur de Canalis,
who does not give his shells, or his nuts either,
for nothing.
The chanticler of the Correze lives in
the rue de Paradis-Poissoniere, number 29, which
is a highly suitable location for a poet of the
angelic school. Letters must be post-paid.
Noble dames of the faubourg Saint-Germain
are said to take the path to Paradise and protect
its god. The king, Charles X., thinks so highly
of this great poet as to believe him capable of governing
the country; he has lately made him officer of the
Legion of honor, and (what pays him better) president
of the court of Claims at the foreign office.
These functions do not hinder this great genius
from drawing an annuity out of the fund for the encouragement
of the arts and belles letters.
The last edition of the works of Canalis,
printed on vellum, royal 8vo, from the press of
Didot, with illustrations by Bixiou, Joseph Bridau,
Schinner, Sommervieux, etc., is in five volumes,
price, nine francs post-paid.
This letter fell like a cobble-stone
on a tulip. A poet, secretary of claims, getting
a stipend in a public office, drawing an annuity,
seeking a decoration, adored by the women of the faubourg
Saint-Germain—was that the muddy minstrel
lingering along the quays, sad, dreamy, worn with
toil, and re-entering his garret fraught with poetry?
However, Modeste perceived the irony of the envious
bookseller, who dared to say, “I invented Canalis;
I made Nathan!” Besides, she re-read her hero’s
poems,—verses extremely seductive, insincere,
and hypocritical, which require a word of analysis,
were it only to explain her infatuation.
Canalis may be distinguished from
Lamartine, chief of the angelic school, by a wheedling
tone like that of a sick-nurse, a treacherous sweetness,
and a delightful correctness of diction. If the
chief with his strident cry is an eagle, Canalis,
rose and white, is a flamingo. In him women find
the friend they seek, their interpreter, a being who
understands them, who explains them to themselves,
and a safe confidant. The wide margins given
by Didot to the last edition were crowded with Modeste’s
pencilled sentiments, expressing her sympathy with
this tender and dreamy spirit. Canalis does not
possess the gift of life; he cannot breathe existence
into his creations; but he knows how to calm vague
sufferings like those which assailed Modeste.
He speaks to young girls in their own language; he
can allay the anguish of a bleeding wound and lull
the moans, even the sobs of woe. His gift lies
not in stirring words, nor in the remedy of strong
emotions, he contents himself with saying in harmonious
tones which compel belief, “I suffer with you;
I understand you; come with me; let us weep together
beside the brook, beneath the willows.”
And they follow him! They listen to his empty
and sonorous poetry like infants to a nurse’s
lullaby. Canalis, like Nodier, enchants the reader
by an artlessness which is genuine in the prose writer
and artificial in the poet, by his tact, his smile,
the shedding of his rose-leaves, in short by his infantile
philosophy. He imitates so well the language of
our early youth that he leads us back to the prairie-land
of our illusions. We can be pitiless to the eagles,
requiring from them the quality of the diamond, incorruptible
perfection; but as for Canalis, we take him for what
he is and let the rest go. He seems a good fellow;
the affectations of the angelic school have answered
his purpose and succeeded, just as a woman succeeds
when she plays the ingenue cleverly, and simulates
surprise, youth, innocence betrayed, in short, the
wounded angel.
Modeste, recovering her first impression,
renewed her confidence in that soul, in that countenance
as ravishing as the face of Bernardin de Saint-Pierre.
She paid no further attention to the publisher.
And so, about the beginning of the month of August
she wrote the following letter to this Dorat of the
sacristy, who still ranks as a star of the modern
Pleiades.
To Monsieur de Canalis,—Many
a time, monsieur, I have wished to write to you;
and why? Surely you guess why,—to tell
you how much I admire your genius. Yes, I feel
the need of expressing to you the admiration of
a poor country girl, lonely in her little corner,
whose only happiness is to read your thoughts.
I have read Rene, and I come to you. Sadness
leads to reverie. How many other women are
sending you the homage of their secret thoughts?
What chance have I for notice among so many?
This paper, filled with my soul,—can
it be more to you than the perfumed letters which
already beset you. I come to you with less grace
than others, for I wish to remain unknown and yet
to receive your entire confidence —as
though you had long known me.
Answer my letter and be friendly with
me. I cannot promise to make
myself known to you, though I do not positively
say I will not
some day do so.
What shall I add? Read between the
lines of this letter, monsieur,
the great effort which I am making:
permit me to offer you my
hand,—that of a friend, ah!
a true friend.
Your servant, O. d’Este M.
P.S.—If you do me the
favor to answer this letter address your
reply, if you please, to Mademoiselle F. Cochet,
“poste restante,”
Havre.