LADY SUSAN TO MRS. JOHNSON
Upper Seymour Street.
My dear Alicia,—I yield
to the necessity which parts us. Under circumstances
you could not act otherwise. Our friendship cannot
be impaired by it, and in happier times, when your
situation is as independent as mine, it will unite
us again in the same intimacy as ever. For this
I shall impatiently wait, and meanwhile can safely
assure you that I never was more at ease, or better
satisfied with myself and everything about me than
at the present hour. Your husband I abhor, Reginald
I despise, and I am secure of never seeing either
again. Have I not reason to rejoice? Mainwaring
is more devoted to me than ever; and were we at liberty,
I doubt if I could resist even matrimony offered by
him. This event, if his wife live with you,
it may be in your power to hasten. The violence
of her feelings, which must wear her out, may be easily
kept in irritation. I rely on your friendship
for this. I am now satisfied that I never could
have brought myself to marry Reginald, and am equally
determined that Frederica never shall. To-morrow,
I shall fetch her from Churchhill, and let Maria Mainwaring
tremble for the consequence. Frederica shall be
Sir James’s wife before she quits my house,
and she may whimper, and the Vernons may storm, I
regard them not. I am tired of submitting my will
to the caprices of others; of resigning my own judgment
in deference to those to whom I owe no duty, and for
whom I feel no respect. I have given up too much,
have been too easily worked on, but Frederica shall
now feel the difference. Adieu, dearest of friends;
may the next gouty attack be more favourable! and may
you always regard me as unalterably yours,
S. VERNON
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