It will be generally admitted that
Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony is the most sublime
noise that has ever penetrated into the ear of man.
All sorts and conditions are satisfied by it.
Whether you are like Mrs. Munt, and tap surreptitiously
when the tunes come— of course, not so
as to disturb the others—or like Helen,
who can see heroes and shipwrecks in the music’s
flood; or like Margaret, who can only see the music;
or like Tibby, who is profoundly versed in counterpoint,
and holds the full score open on his knee; or like
their cousin, Fraulein Mosebach, who remembers all
the time that Beethoven is echt Deutsch; or like Fraulein
Mosebach’s young man, who can remember nothing
but Fraulein Mosebach: in any case, the passion
of your life becomes more vivid, and you are bound
to admit that such a noise is cheap at two shillings.
It is cheap, even if you hear it in the Queen’s
Hall, dreariest music-room in London, though not as
dreary as the Free Trade Hall, Manchester; and even
if you sit on the extreme left of that hall, so that
the brass bumps at you before the rest of the orchestra
arrives, it is still cheap.
“Whom is Margaret talking to?”
said Mrs. Munt, at the conclusion of the first movement.
She was again in London on a visit to Wickham Place.
Helen looked down the long line of
their party, and said that she did not know.
“Would it be some young man
or other whom she takes an interest in?”
“I expect so,” Helen replied.
Music enwrapped her, and she could not enter into
the distinction that divides young men whom one takes
an interest in from young men whom one knows.
“You girls are so wonderful
in always having—Oh dear! one mustn’t
talk.”
For the Andante had begun—very
beautiful, but bearing a family likeness to all the
other beautiful Andantes that Beethoven had written,
and, to Helen’s mind, rather disconnecting the
heroes and shipwrecks of the first movement from the
heroes and goblins of the third. She heard the
tune through once, and then her attention wandered,
and she gazed at the audience, or the organ, or the
architecture. Much did she censure the attenuated
Cupids who encircle the ceiling of the Queen’s
Hall, inclining each to each with vapid gesture, and
clad in sallow pantaloons, on which the October sunlight
struck. “How awful to marry a man like those
Cupids!” thought Helen. Here Beethoven started
decorating his tune, so she heard him through once
more, and then she smiled at her Cousin Frieda.
But Frieda, listening to Classical Music, could not
respond. Herr Liesecke, too, looked as if wild
horses could not make him inattentive; there were
lines across his forehead, his lips were parted, his
pince-nez at right angles to his nose, and he had
laid a thick, white hand on either knee. And
next to her was Aunt Juley, so British, and wanting
to tap. How interesting that row of people was!
What diverse influences had gone to the making!
Here Beethoven, after humming and hawing with great
sweetness, said “Heigho,” and the Andante
came to an end. Applause, and a round of “wunderschoning”
and pracht volleying from the German contingent.
Margaret started talking to her new young man; Helen
said to her aunt: “Now comes the wonderful
movement: first of all the goblins, and then a
trio of elephants dancing”; and Tibby implored
the company generally to look out for the transitional
passage on the drum.
“On the what, dear?”
“On the drum, Aunt Juley.”
“No; look out for the part where
you think you have done with the goblins and they
come back,” breathed Helen, as the music started
with a goblin walking quietly over the universe, from
end to end. Others followed him. They were
not aggressive creatures; it was that that made them
so terrible to Helen. They merely observed in
passing that there was no such thing as splendour or
heroism in the world. After the interlude of
elephants dancing, they returned and made the observation
for the second time. Helen could not contradict
them, for, once at all events, she had felt the same,
and had seen the reliable walls of youth collapse.
Panic and emptiness! Panic and emptiness!
The goblins were right. Her brother raised his
finger; it was the transitional passage on the drum.
For, as if things were going too far,
Beethoven took hold of the goblins and made them do
what he wanted. He appeared in person. He
gave them a little push, and they began to walk in
a major key instead of in a minor, and then—he
blew with his mouth and they were scattered!
Gusts of splendour, gods and demigods contending with
vast swords, colour and fragrance broadcast on the
field of battle, magnificent victory, magnificent
death! Oh, it all burst before the girl, and
she even stretched out her gloved hands as if it was
tangible. Any fate was titanic; any contest desirable;
conqueror and conquered would alike be applauded by
the angels of the utmost stars.
And the goblins—they had
not really been there at all? They were only
the phantoms of cowardice and unbelief? One healthy
human impulse would dispel them? Men like the
Wilcoxes, or ex-President Roosevelt, would say yes.
Beethoven knew better. The goblins really had
been there. They might return—and they
did. It was as if the splendour of life might
boil over and waste to steam and froth. In its
dissolution one heard the terrible, ominous note,
and a goblin, with increased malignity, walked quietly
over the universe from end to end. Panic and
emptiness! Panic and emptiness! Even the
flaming ramparts of the world might fall. Beethoven
chose to make all right in the end. He built the
ramparts up. He blew with his mouth for the second
time, and again the goblins were scattered. He
brought back the gusts of splendour, the heroism,
the youth, the magnificence of life and of death,
and, amid vast roarings of a superhuman joy, he led
his Fifth Symphony to its conclusion. But the
goblins were there. They could return. He
had said so bravely, and that is why one can trust
Beethoven when he says other things.
Helen pushed her way out during the
applause. She desired to be alone. The music
had summed up to her all that had happened or could
happen in her career.
She read it as a tangible statement,
which could never be superseded. The notes meant
this and that to her, and they could have no other
meaning, and life could have no other meaning.
She pushed right out of the building and walked slowly
down the outside staircase, breathing the autumnal
air, and then she strolled home.
“Margaret,” called Mrs. Munt, “is
Helen all right?”
“Oh yes.”
“She is always going away in
the middle of a programme,” said Tibby.
“The music has evidently moved
her deeply,” said Fraulein Mosebach.
“Excuse me,” said Margaret’s
young man, who had for some time been preparing a
sentence, “but that lady has, quite inadvertently,
taken my umbrella.”
“Oh, good gracious me!—I
am so sorry. Tibby, run after Helen.”
“I shall miss the Four Serious Songs if I do.”
“Tibby, love, you must go.”
“It isn’t of any consequence,”
said the young man, in truth a little uneasy about
his umbrella.
“But of course it is. Tibby! Tibby!”
Tibby rose to his feet, and wilfully
caught his person on the backs of the chairs.
By the time he had tipped up the seat and had found
his hat, and had deposited his full score in safety,
it was “too late” to go after Helen.
The Four Serious Songs had begun, and one could not
move during their performance.
“My sister is so careless,” whispered
Margaret.
“Not at all,” replied
the young man; but his voice was dead and cold.
“If you would give me your address—”
“Oh, not at all, not at all;”
and he wrapped his greatcoat over his knees.
Then the Four Serious Songs rang shallow
in Margaret’s ears. Brahms, for all his
grumbling and grizzling, had never guessed what it
felt like to be suspected of stealing an umbrella.
For this fool of a young man thought that she and
Helen and Tibby had been playing the confidence trick
on him, and that if he gave his address they would
break into his rooms some midnight or other and steal
his walking-stick too. Most ladies would have
laughed, but Margaret really minded, for it gave her
a glimpse into squalor. To trust people is a
luxury in which only the wealthy can indulge; the
poor cannot afford it. As soon as Brahms had
grunted himself out, she gave him her card and said,
“That is where we live; if you preferred, you
could call for the umbrella after the concert, but
I didn’t like to trouble you when it has all
been our fault.”
His face brightened a little when
he saw that Wickham Place was W. It was sad to see
him corroded with suspicion, and yet not daring to
be impolite, in case these well-dressed people were
honest after all. She took it as a good sign that
he said to her, “It’s a fine programme
this afternoon, is it not?” for this was the
remark with which he had originally opened, before
the umbrella intervened.
“The Beethoven’s fine,”
said Margaret, who was not a female of the encouraging
type. “I don’t like the Brahms, though,
nor the Mendelssohn that came first and ugh!
I don’t like this Elgar that’s coming.”
“What, what?” called Herr
Liesecke, overhearing. “The ’Pomp
and Circumstance’ will not be fine?”
“Oh, Margaret, you tiresome girl!” cried
her aunt.
“Here have I been persuading
Herr Liesecke to stop for ’Pomp and Circumstance,’
and you are undoing all my work. I am so anxious
for him to hear what we are doing in music.
Oh,—you musn’t run down our English
composers, Margaret.”
“For my part, I have heard the
composition at Stettin,” said Fraulein Mosebach,
“on two occasions. It is dramatic, a little.”
“Frieda, you despise English
music. You know you do. And English art.
And English literature, except Shakespeare, and he’s
a German. Very well, Frieda, you may go.”
The lovers laughed and glanced at
each other. Moved by a common impulse, they rose
to their feet and fled from “Pomp and Circumstance.”
“We have this call to pay in
Finsbury Circus, it is true,” said Herr Liesecke,
as he edged past her and reached the gangway just
as the music started.
“Margaret—” loudly whispered
by Aunt Juley.
“Margaret, Margaret! Fraulein
Mosebach has left her beautiful little bag behind
her on the seat.”
Sure enough, there was Frieda’s
reticule, containing her address book, her pocket
dictionary, her map of London, and her money.
“Oh, what a bother—what
a family we are! Fr—frieda!”
“Hush!” said all those who thought the
music fine.
“But it’s the number they want in Finsbury
Circus.”
“Might I—couldn’t
I—” said the suspicious young man,
and got very red.
“Oh, I would be so grateful.”
He took the bag—money clinking
inside it—and slipped up the gangway with
it. He was just in time to catch them at the
swing-door, and he received a pretty smile from the
German girl and a fine bow from her cavalier.
He returned to his seat upsides with the world.
The trust that they had reposed in him was trivial,
but he felt that it cancelled his mistrust for them,
and that probably he would not be “had”
over his umbrella. This young man had been “had”
in the past badly, perhaps overwhelmingly—and
now most of his energies went in defending himself
against the unknown. But this afternoon—perhaps
on account of music—he perceived that one
must slack off occasionally or what is the good of
being alive? Wickham Place, W., though a risk,
was as safe as most things, and he would risk it.
So when the concert was over and Margaret
said, “We live quite near; I am going there
now. Could you walk round with me, and we’ll
find your umbrella?” he said, “Thank you,”
peaceably, and followed her out of the Queen’s
Hall. She wished that he was not so anxious to
hand a lady downstairs, or to carry a lady’s
programme for her—his class was near enough
her own for its manners to vex her. But she found
him interesting on the whole— every one
interested the Schlegels on the whole at that time—and
while her lips talked culture, her heart was planning
to invite him to tea.
“How tired one gets after music!” she
began.
“Do you find the atmosphere of Queen’s
Hall oppressive?”
“Yes, horribly.”
“But surely the atmosphere of
Covent Garden is even more oppressive.”
“Do you go there much?”
“When my work permits, I attend the gallery
for the Royal Opera.”
Helen would have exclaimed, “So
do I. I love the gallery,” and thus have endeared
herself to the young man. Helen could do these
things. But Margaret had an almost morbid horror
of “drawing people out,” of “making
things go.” She had been to the gallery
at Covent Garden, but she did not “attend”
it, preferring the more expensive seats; still less
did she love it. So she made no reply.
“This year I have been three
times—to ‘Faust,’ ‘Tosca,’
and—” Was it “Tannhouser”
or “Tannhoyser”? Better not risk the
word.
Margaret disliked “Tosca”
and “Faust.” And so, for one reason
and another, they walked on in silence, chaperoned
by the voice of Mrs. Munt, who was getting into difficulties
with her nephew.
“I do in a way remember
the passage, Tibby, but when every instrument is so
beautiful, it is difficult to pick out one thing rather
than another. I am sure that you and Helen take
me to the very nicest concerts. Not a dull note
from beginning to end. I only wish that our German
friends had stayed till it finished.”
“But surely you haven’t
forgotten the drum steadily beating on the low C,
Aunt Juley?” came Tibby’s voice. “No
one could. It’s unmistakable.”
“A specially loud part?”
hazarded Mrs. Munt. “Of course I do not
go in for being musical,” she added, the shot
failing. “I only care for music—a
very different thing. But still I will say this
for myself—I do know when I like a thing
and when I don’t. Some people are the same
about pictures. They can go into a picture gallery—Miss
Conder can—and say straight off what they
feel, all round the wall. I never could do that.
But music is so different from pictures, to my mind.
When it comes to music I am as safe as houses, and
I assure you, Tibby, I am by no means pleased by everything.
There was a thing—something about a faun
in French—which Helen went into ecstasies
over, but I thought it most tinkling and superficial,
and said so, and I held to my opinion too.”
“Do you agree?” asked
Margaret. “Do you think music is so different
from pictures?”
“I—I should have thought so, kind
of,” he said.
“So should I. Now, my sister
declares they’re just the same. We have
great arguments over it. She says I’m dense;
I say she’s sloppy.” Getting under
way, she cried: “Now, doesn’t it seem
absurd to you? What is the good of the Arts if
they ’re interchangeable? What is the good
of the ear if it tells you the same as the eye?
Helen’s one aim is to translate tunes into the
language of painting, and pictures into the language
of music. It’s very ingenious, and she
says several pretty things in the process, but what’s
gained, I’d like to know? Oh, it’s
all rubbish, radically false. If Monet’s
really Debussy, and Debussy’s really Monet,
neither gentleman is worth his salt— that’s
my opinion.”
Evidently these sisters quarrelled.
“Now, this very symphony that
we’ve just been having—she won’t
let it alone. She labels it with meanings from
start to finish; turns it into literature. I
wonder if the day will ever return when music will
be treated as music. Yet I don’t know.
There’s my brother—behind us.
He treats music as music, and oh, my goodness!
He makes me angrier than any one, simply furious.
With him I daren’t even argue.”
An unhappy family, if talented.
“But, of course, the real villain
is Wagner. He has done more than any man in the
nineteenth century towards the muddling of the arts.
I do feel that music is in a very serious state just
now, though extraordinarily interesting. Every
now and then in history there do come these terrible
geniuses, like Wagner, who stir up all the wells of
thought at once. For a moment it’s splendid.
Such a splash as never was. But afterwards—such
a lot of mud; and the wells—as it were,
they communicate with each other too easily now, and
not one of them will run quite clear. That’s
what Wagner’s done.”
Her speeches fluttered away from the
young man like birds. If only he could talk like
this, he would have caught the world. Oh, to
acquire culture! Oh, to pronounce foreign names
correctly! Oh, to be well informed, discoursing
at ease on every subject that a lady started!
But it would take one years. With an hour at lunch
and a few shattered hours in the evening, how was it
possible to catch up with leisured women, who had
been reading steadily from childhood? His brain
might be full of names, he might have even heard of
Monet and Debussy; the trouble was that he could not
string them together into a sentence, he could not
make them “tell,” he could not quite forget
about his stolen umbrella. Yes, the umbrella
was the real trouble. Behind Monet and Debussy
the umbrella persisted, with the steady beat of a
drum. “I suppose my umbrella will be all
right,” he was thinking. “I don’t
really mind about it. I will think about music
instead. I suppose my umbrella will be all right.”
Earlier in the afternoon he had worried about seats.
Ought he to have paid as much as two shillings?
Earlier still he had wondered, “Shall I try to
do without a programme?” There had always been
something to worry him ever since he could remember,
always something that distracted him in the pursuit
of beauty. For he did pursue beauty, and, therefore,
Margaret’s speeches did flutter away from him
like birds.
Margaret talked ahead, occasionally
saying, “Don’t you think so? don’t
you feel the same?” And once she stopped, and
said, “Oh, do interrupt me!” which terrified
him. She did not attract him, though she filled
him with awe. Her figure was meagre, her face
seemed all teeth and eyes, her references to her sister
and her brother were uncharitable. For all her
cleverness and culture, she was probably one of those
soulless, atheistical women who have been so shown
up by Miss Corelli. It was surprising (and alarming)
that she should suddenly say, “I do hope that
you’ll come in and have some tea. We should
be so glad. I have dragged you so far out of
your way.”
They had arrived at Wickham Place.
The sun had set, and the backwater, in deep shadow,
was filling with a gentle haze. To the right
the fantastic sky-line of the flats towered black against
the hues of evening; to the left the older houses raised
a square-cut, irregular parapet against the grey.
Margaret fumbled for her latch-key. Of course
she had forgotten it. So, grasping her umbrella
by its ferrule, she leant over the area and tapped
at the dining-room window.
“Helen! Let us in!”
“All right,” said a voice.
“You’ve been taking this gentleman’s
umbrella.”
“Taken a what?” said Helen,
opening the door. “Oh, what’s that?
Do come in! How do you do?”
“Helen, you must not be so ramshackly.
You took this gentleman’s umbrella away from
Queen’s Hall, and he has had the trouble of
coming round for it.”
“Oh, I am so sorry!” cried
Helen, all her hair flying. She had pulled off
her hat as soon as she returned, and had flung herself
into the big dining-room chair. “I do nothing
but steal umbrellas. I am so very sorry!
Do come in and choose one. Is yours a hooky or
a nobbly? Mine’s a nobbly—at
least, I think it is.”
The light was turned on, and they
began to search the hall, Helen, who had abruptly
parted with the Fifth Symphony, commenting with shrill
little cries.
“Don’t you talk, Meg,!
You stole an old gentleman’s silk top-hat.
Yes, she did, Aunt Juley. It is a positive fact.
She thought it was a muff. Oh, heavens!
I’ve knocked the In-and-Out card down.
Where’s Frieda? Tibby, why don’t you
ever— No, I can’t remember what I
was going to say. That wasn’t it, but do
tell the maids to hurry tea up. What about this
umbrella? ” She opened it. “No, it’s
all gone along the seams. It’s an appalling
umbrella. It must be mine.”
But it was not.
He took it from her, murmured a few
words of thanks, and then fled, with the lilting step
of the clerk.
“But if you will stop—”
cried Margaret. “Now, Helen, how stupid
you’ve been!”
“Whatever have I done?”
“Don’t you see that you’ve
frightened him away? I meant him to stop to tea.
You oughtn’t to talk about stealing or holes
in an umbrella. I saw his nice eyes getting so
miserable. No, it’s not a bit of good now.”
For Helen had darted out into the street, shouting,
“Oh, do stop!”
“I dare say it is all for the
best,” opined Mrs. Munt. “We know
nothing about the young man, Margaret, and your drawing-room
is full of very tempting little things.”
But Helen cried: “Aunt
Juley, how can you! You make me more and more
ashamed. I’d rather he had been a thief
and taken all the apostle spoons than that I—
Well, I must shut the front-door, I suppose.
One more failure for Helen.”
“Yes, I think the apostle spoons
could have gone as rent,” said Margaret.
Seeing that her aunt did not understand, she added:
“You remember ‘rent’? It was
one of father’s words— Rent to the
ideal, to his own faith in human nature. You remember
how he would trust strangers, and if they fooled him
he would say, ’It’s better to be fooled
than to be suspicious’—that the confidence
trick is the work of man, but the want-of-confidence
trick is the work of the devil.”
“I remember something of the
sort now,” said Mrs. Munt, rather tartly, for
she longed to add, “It was lucky that your father
married a wife with money.” But this was
unkind, and she contented herself with, “Why,
he might have stolen the little Ricketts picture as
well.”
“Better that he had,” said Helen stoutly.
“No, I agree with Aunt Juley,”
said Margaret. “I’d rather mistrust
people than lose my little Ricketts. There are
limits.”
Their brother, finding the incident
commonplace, had stolen upstairs to see whether there
were scones for tea. He warmed the teapot—almost
too deftly—rejected the orange pekoe that
the parlour-maid had provided, poured in five spoonfuls
of a superior blend, filled up with really boiling
water, and now called to the ladies to be quick or
they would lose the aroma.
“All right, Auntie Tibby,”
called Heien, while Margaret, thoughtful again, said:
“In a way, I wish we had a real boy in the house—the
kind of boy who cares for men. It would make
entertaining so much easier.”
“So do I,” said her sister.
“Tibby only cares for cultured females singing
Brahms.” And when they joined him she said
rather sharply: “Why didn’t you make
that young man welcome, Tibby? You must do the
host a little, you know. You ought to have taken
his hat and coaxed him into stopping, instead of letting
him be swamped by screaming women.”
Tibby sighed, and drew a long strand
of hair over his forehead.
“Oh, it’s no good looking
superior. I mean what I say.”
“Leave Tibby alone!” said
Margaret, who could not bear her brother to be scolded.
“Here’s the house a regular
hen-coop!” grumbled Helen.
“Oh, my dear!” protested
Mrs. Munt. “How can you say such dreadful
things! The number of men you get here has always
astonished me. If there is any danger it’s
the other way round.”
“Yes, but it’s the wrong sort of men,
Helen means.”
“No, I don’t,” corrected
Helen. “We get the right sort of man, but
the wrong side of him, and I say that’s Tibby’s
fault. There ought to be a something about the
house—an—I don’t know what.”
“A touch of the W’s, perhaps?”
Helen put out her tongue.
“Who are the W’s?” asked Tibby.
“The W’s are things I
and Meg and Aunt Juley know about and you don’t,
so there!”
“I suppose that ours is a female
house,” said Margaret, “and one must just
accept it. No, Aunt Juley, I don’t mean
that this house is full of women. I am trying
to say something much more clever. I mean that
it was irrevocably feminine, even in father’s
time. Now I’m sure you understand!
Well, I’ll give you another example. It’ll
shock you, but I don’t care. Suppose Queen
Victoria gave a dinner-party, and that the guests
had been Leighton, Millais, Swinburne, Rossetti, Meredith,
Fitzgerald, etc. Do you suppose that the
atmosphere of that dinner would have been artistic?
Heavens, no! The very chairs on which they sat
would have seen to that. So with out house—it
must be feminine, and all we can do is to see that
it isn’t effeminate. Just as another house
that I can mention, but won’t, sounded irrevocably
masculine, and all its inmates can do is to see that
it isn’t brutal.”
“That house being the W’s
house, I presume,” said Tibby.
“You’re not going to be
told about the W’s, my child,” Helen cried,
“so don’t you think it. And on the
other hand, I don’t the least mind if you find
out, so don’t you think you’ve done anything
clever, in either case. Give me a cigarette.”
“You do what you can for the
house,” said Margaret. “The drawing-room
reeks of smoke.”
“If you smoked too, the house
might suddenly turn masculine. Atmosphere is
probably a question of touch and go. Even at Queen
Victoria’s dinner-party—if something
had been just a little Different—perhaps
if she’d worn a clinging Liberty tea-gown instead
of a magenta satin.”
“With an India shawl over her shoulders—”
“Fastened at the bosom with a Cairngorm-pin.”
Bursts of disloyal laughter—you
must remember that they are half German—greeted
these suggestions, and Margaret said pensively, “How
inconceivable it would be if the Royal Family cared
about Art.” And the conversation drifted
away and away, and Helen’s cigarette turned
to a spot in the darkness, and the great flats opposite
were sown with lighted windows which vanished and were
refit again, and vanished incessantly. Beyond
them the thoroughfare roared gently—a tide
that could never be quiet, while in the east, invisible
behind the smokes of Wapping, the moon was rising.
“That reminds me, Margaret.
We might have taken that young man into the dining-room,
at all events. Only the majolica plate—and
that is so firmly set in the wall. I am really
distressed that he had no tea.”
For that little incident had impressed
the three women more than might be supposed.
It remained as a goblin footfall, as a hint that all
is not for the best in the best of all possible worlds,
and that beneath these superstructures of wealth and
art there wanders an ill-fed boy, who has recovered
his umbrella indeed, but who has left no address behind
him, and no name.