Many years ago, on my way from Hongkong
to New York, I assed a week in San Francisco.
A long time had gone by since I had been in that
city, during which my ventures in the Orient had prospered
beyond my hope; I was rich and could afford to revisit
my own country to renew my friendship with such of
the companions of my youth as still lived and remembered
me with the old affection. Chief of these, I
hoped, was Mohun Dampier, an old schoolmate with whom
I had held a desultory correspondence which had long
ceased, as is the way of correspondence between men.
You may have observed that the indisposition to write
a merely social letter is in the ratio of the square
of the distance between you and your correspondent.
It is a law.
I remembered Dampier as a handsome,
strong young fellow of scholarly tastes, with an aversion
to work and a marked indifference to many of the things
that the world cares for, including wealth, of which,
however, he had inherited enough to put him beyond
the reach of want. In his family, one of the
oldest and most aristocratic in the country, it was,
I think, a matter of pride that no member of it had
ever been in trade nor politics, nor suffered any kind
of distinction. Mohun was a trifle sentimental,
and had in him a singular element of superstition,
which led him to the study of all manner of occult
subjects, although his sane mental health safeguarded
him against fantastic and perilous faiths. He
made daring incursions into the realm of the unreal
without renouncing his residence in the partly surveyed
and charted region of what we are pleased to call
certitude.
The night of my visit to him was stormy.
The Californian winter was on, and the incessant
rain plashed in the deserted streets, or, lifted by
irregular gusts of wind, was hurled against the houses
with incredible fury. With no small difficulty
my cabman found the right place, away out toward the
ocean beach, in a sparsely populated suburb.
The dwelling, a rather ugly one, apparently, stood
in the center of its grounds, which as nearly as I
could make out in the gloom were destitute of either
flowers or grass. Three or four trees, writhing
and moaning in the torment of the tempest, appeared
to be trying to escape from their dismal environment
and take the chance of finding a better one out at
sea. The house was a two-story brick structure
with a tower, a story higher, at one corner.
In a window of that was the only visible light.
Something in the appearance of the place made me
shudder, a performance that may have been assisted
by a rill of rain-water down my back as I scuttled
to cover in the doorway.
In answer to my note apprising him
of my wish to call, Dampier had written, “Don’t
ring—open the door and come up.”
I did so. The staircase was dimly lighted by
a single gas-jet at the top of the second flight.
I managed to reach the landing without disaster and
entered by an open door into the lighted square room
of the tower. Dampier came forward in gown and
slippers to receive me, giving me the greeting that
I wished, and if I had held a thought that it might
more fitly have been accorded me at the front door
the first look at him dispelled any sense of his inhospitality.
He was not the same. Hardly
past middle age, he had gone gray and had acquired
a pronounced stoop. His figure was thin and angular,
his face deeply lined, his complexion dead-white, without
a touch of color. His eyes, unnaturally large,
glowed with a fire that was almost uncanny.
He seated me, proffered a cigar, and
with grave and obvious sincerity assured me of the
pleasure that it gave him to meet me. Some unimportant
conversation followed, but all the while I was dominated
by a melancholy sense of the great change in him.
This he must have perceived, for he suddenly said
with a bright enough smile, “You are disappointed
in me—non sum qualis eram.”
I hardly knew what to reply, but managed
to say: “Why, really, I don’t know:
your Latin is about the same.”
He brightened again. “No,”
he said, “being a dead language, it grows in
appropriateness. But please have the patience
to wait: where I am going there is perhaps a
better tongue. Will you care to have a message
in it?”
The smile faded as he spoke, and as
he concluded he was looking into my eyes with a gravity
that distressed me. Yet I would not surrender
myself to his mood, nor permit him to see how deeply
his prescience of death affected me.
“I fancy that it will be long,”
I said, “before human speech will cease to serve
our need; and then the need, with its possibilities
of service, will have passed.”
He made no reply, and I too was silent,
for the talk had taken a dispiriting turn, yet I knew
not how to give it a more agreeable character.
Suddenly, in a pause of the storm, when the dead silence
was almost startling by contrast with the previous
uproar, I heard a gentle tapping, which appeared to
come from the wall behind my chair. The sound
was such as might have been made by a human hand, not
as upon a door by one asking admittance, but rather,
I thought, as an agreed signal, an assurance of someone’s
presence in an adjoining room; most of us, I fancy,
have had more experience of such communications than
we should care to relate. I glanced at Dampier.
If possibly there was something of amusement in the
look he did not observe it. He appeared to have
forgotten my presence, and was staring at the wall
behind me with an expression in his eyes that I am
unable to name, although my memory of it is as vivid
to-day as was my sense of it then. The situation
was embarrassing; I rose to take my leave. At
this he seemed to recover himself.
“Please be seated,” he
said; “it is nothing—no one is there.”
But the tapping was repeated, and
with the same gentle, slow insistence as before.
“Pardon me,” I said, “it
is late. May I call to-morrow?”
He smiled—a little mechanically,
I thought. “It is very delicate of you,”
said he, “but quite needless. Really, this
is the only room in the tower, and no one is there.
At least—” He left the sentence
incomplete, rose, and threw up a window, the only opening
in the wall from which the sound seemed to come.
“See.”
Not clearly knowing what else to do
I followed him to the window and looked out.
A street-lamp some little distance away gave enough
light through the murk of the rain that was again falling
in torrents to make it entirely plain that “no
one was there.” In truth there was nothing
but the sheer blank wall of the tower.
Dampier closed the window and signing
me to my seat resumed his own.
The incident was not in itself particularly
mysterious; any one of a dozen explanations was possible
(though none has occurred to me), yet it impressed
me strangely, the more, perhaps, from my friend’s
effort to reassure me, which seemed to dignify it
with a certain significance and importance.
He had proved that no one was there, but in that fact
lay all the interest; and he proffered no explanation.
His silence was irritating and made me resentful.
“My good friend,” I said,
somewhat ironically, I fear, “I am not disposed
to question your right to harbor as many spooks as
you find agreeable to your taste and consistent with
your notions of companionship; that is no business
of mine. But being just a plain man of affairs,
mostly of this world, I find spooks needless to my
peace and comfort. I am going to my hotel, where
my fellow-guests are still in the flesh.”
It was not a very civil speech, but
he manifested no feeling about it. “Kindly
remain,” he said. “I am grateful
for your presence here. What you have heard
to-night I believe myself to have heard twice before.
Now I know it was no illusion. That is
much to me— more than you know. Have
a fresh cigar and a good stock of patience while I
tell you the story.”
The rain was now falling more steadily,
with a low, monotonous susurration, interrupted at
long intervals by the sudden slashing of the boughs
of the trees as the wind rose and failed. The
night was well advanced, but both sympathy and curiosity
held me a willing listener to my friend’s monologue,
which I did not interrupt by a single word from beginning
to end.
“Ten years ago,” he said,
“I occupied a ground-floor apartment in one
of a row of houses, all alike, away at the other end
of the town, on what we call Rincon Hill. This
had been the best quarter of San Francisco, but had
fallen into neglect and decay, partly because the
primitive character of its domestic architecture no
longer suited the maturing tastes of our wealthy citizens,
partly because certain public improvements had made
a wreck of it. The row of dwellings in one of
which I lived stood a little way back from the street,
each having a miniature garden, separated from its
neighbors by low iron fences and bisected with mathematical
precision by a box-bordered gravel walk from gate
to door.
“One morning as I was leaving
my lodging I observed a young girl entering the adjoining
garden on the left. It was a warm day in June,
and she was lightly gowned in white. From her
shoulders hung a broad straw hat profusely decorated
with flowers and wonderfully beribboned in the fashion
of the time. My attention was not long held
by the exquisite simplicity of her costume, for no
one could look at her face and think of anything earthly.
Do not fear; I shall not profane it by description;
it was beautiful exceedingly. All that I had
ever seen or dreamed of loveliness was in that matchless
living picture by the hand of the Divine Artist.
So deeply did it move me that, without a thought
of the impropriety of the act, I unconsciously bared
my head, as a devout Catholic or well-bred Protestant
uncovers before an image of the Blessed Virgin.
The maiden showed no displeasure; she merely turned
her glorious dark eyes upon me with a look that made
me catch my breath, and without other recognition
of my act passed into the house. For a moment
I stood motionless, hat in hand, painfully conscious
of my rudeness, yet so dominated by the emotion inspired
by that vision of incomparable beauty that my penitence
was less poignant than it should have been.
Then I went my way, leaving my heart behind.
In the natural course of things I should probably
have remained away until nightfall, but by the middle
of the afternoon I was back in the little garden,
affecting an interest in the few foolish flowers that
I had never before observed. My hope was vain;
she did not appear.
“To a night of unrest succeeded
a day of expectation and disappointment, but on the
day after, as I wandered aimlessly about the neighborhood,
I met her. Of course I did not repeat my folly
of uncovering, nor venture by even so much as too
long a look to manifest an interest in her; yet my
heart was beating audibly. I trembled and consciously
colored as she turned her big black eyes upon me with
a look of obvious recognition entirely devoid of boldness
or coquetry.
“I will not weary you with particulars;
many times afterward I met the maiden, yet never either
addressed her or sought to fix her attention.
Nor did I take any action toward making her acquaintance.
Perhaps my forbearance, requiring so supreme an effort
of self-denial, will not be entirely clear to you.
That I was heels over head in love is true, but who
can overcome his habit of thought, or reconstruct
his character?
“I was what some foolish persons
are pleased to call, and others, more foolish, are
pleased to be called—an aristocrat; and
despite her beauty, her charms and graces, the girl
was not of my class. I had learned her name—which
it is needless to speak—and something of
her family. She was an orphan, a dependent niece
of the impossible elderly fat woman in whose lodging-house
she lived. My income was small and I lacked
the talent for marrying; it is perhaps a gift.
An alliance with that family would condemn me to
its manner of life, part me from my books and studies,
and in a social sense reduce me to the ranks.
It is easy to deprecate such considerations as these
and I have not retained myself for the defense.
Let judgment be entered against me, but in strict
justice all my ancestors for generations should be
made co-defendants and I be permitted to plead in
mitigation of punishment the imperious mandate of heredity.
To a mesalliance of that kind every globule of my
ancestral blood spoke in opposition. In brief,
my tastes, habits, instinct, with whatever of reason
my love had left me—all fought against it.
Moreover, I was an irreclaimable sentimentalist,
and found a subtle charm in an impersonal and spiritual
relation which acquaintance might vulgarize and marriage
would certainly dispel. No woman, I argued, is
what this lovely creature seems. Love is a delicious
dream; why should I bring about my own awakening?
“The course dictated by all
this sense and sentiment was obvious. Honor,
pride, prudence, preservation of my ideals—all
commanded me to go away, but for that I was too weak.
The utmost that I could do by a mighty effort of
will was to cease meeting the girl, and that I did.
I even avoided the chance encounters of the garden,
leaving my lodging only when I knew that she had gone
to her music lessons, and returning after nightfall.
Yet all the while I was as one in a trance, indulging
the most fascinating fancies and ordering my entire
intellectual life in accordance with my dream.
Ah, my friend, as one whose actions have a traceable
relation to reason, you cannot know the fool’s
paradise in which I lived.
“One evening the devil put it
into my head to be an unspeakable idiot. By
apparently careless and purposeless questioning I learned
from my gossipy landlady that the young woman’s
bedroom adjoined my own, a party-wall between.
Yielding to a sudden and coarse impulse I gently
rapped on the wall. There was no response, naturally,
but I was in no mood to accept a rebuke. A madness
was upon me and I repeated the folly, the offense,
but again ineffectually, and I had the decency to
desist.
“An hour later, while absorbed
in some of my infernal studies, I heard, or thought
I heard, my signal answered. Flinging down my
books I sprang to the wall and as steadily as my beating
heart would permit gave three slow taps upon it.
This time the response was distinct, unmistakable:
one, two, three—an exact repetition of
my signal. That was all I could elicit, but
it was enough—too much.
“The next evening, and for many
evenings afterward, that folly went on, I always having
‘the last word.’ During the whole
period I was deliriously happy, but with the perversity
of my nature I persevered in my resolution not to
see her. Then, as I should have expected, I
got no further answers. ‘She is disgusted,’
I said to myself, ’with what she thinks my timidity
in making no more definite advances’; and I
resolved to seek her and make her acquaintance and—what?
I did not know, nor do I now know, what might have
come of it. I know only that I passed days and
days trying to meet her, and all in vain; she was
invisible as well as inaudible. I haunted the
streets where we had met, but she did not come.
From my window I watched the garden in front of her
house, but she passed neither in nor out. I fell
into the deepest dejection, believing that she had
gone away, yet took no steps to resolve my doubt by
inquiry of my landlady, to whom, indeed, I had taken
an unconquerable aversion from her having once spoken
of the girl with less of reverence than I thought befitting.
“There came a fateful night.
Worn out with emotion, irresolution and despondency,
I had retired early and fallen into such sleep as was
still possible to me. In the middle of the night
something—some malign power bent upon the
wrecking of my peace forever—caused me to
open my eyes and sit up, wide awake and listening intently
for I knew not what. Then I thought I heard
a faint tapping on the wall—the mere ghost
of the familiar signal. In a few moments it was
repeated: one, two, three—no louder
than before, but addressing a sense alert and strained
to receive it. I was about to reply when the
Adversary of Peace again intervened in my affairs
with a rascally suggestion of retaliation. She
had long and cruelly ignored me; now I would ignore
her. Incredible fatuity—may God forgive
it! All the rest of the night I lay awake, fortifying
my obstinacy with shameless justifications and—listening.
“Late the next morning, as I
was leaving the house, I met my landlady, entering.
“‘Good morning, Mr. Dampier,’
she said. ‘Have you heard the news?’
“I replied in words that I had
heard no news; in manner, that I did not care to hear
any. The manner escaped her observation.
“‘About the sick young
lady next door,’ she babbled on. ’What!
you did not know? Why, she has been ill for
weeks. And now—’
“I almost sprang upon her.
‘And now,’ I cried, ‘now what?’
“‘She is dead.’
“That is not the whole story.
In the middle of the night, as I learned later, the
patient, awakening from a long stupor after a week
of delirium, had asked—it was her last utterance—that
her bed be moved to the opposite side of the room.
Those in attendance had thought the request a vagary
of her delirium, but had complied. And there
the poor passing soul had exerted its failing will
to restore a broken connection—a golden
thread of sentiment between its innocence and a monstrous
baseness owning a blind, brutal allegiance to the Law
of Self.
“What reparation could I make?
Are there masses that can be said for the repose
of souls that are abroad such nights as this—spirits
’blown about by the viewless winds’—coming
in the storm and darkness with signs and portents,
hints of memory and presages of doom?
“This is the third visitation.
On the first occasion I was too skeptical to do more
than verify by natural methods the character of the
incident; on the second, I responded to the signal
after it had been several times repeated, but without
result. To-night’s recurrence completes
the ‘fatal triad’ expounded by Parapelius
Necromantius. There is no more to tell.”
When Dampier had finished his story
I could think of nothing relevant that I cared to
say, and to question him would have been a hideous
impertinence. I rose and bade him good night
in a way to convey to him a sense of my sympathy,
which he silently acknowledged by a pressure of the
hand. That night, alone with his sorrow and remorse,
he passed into the Unknown.