A Plea
When the newly-married pair came home,
the first person who appeared, to offer his congratulations,
was Sydney Carton. They had not been at home
many hours, when he presented himself. He was
not improved in habits, or in looks, or in manner;
but there was a certain rugged air of fidelity about
him, which was new to the observation of Charles Darnay.
He watched his opportunity of taking
Darnay aside into a window, and of speaking to him
when no one overheard.
“Mr. Darnay,” said Carton, “I wish
we might be friends.”
“We are already friends, I hope.”
“You are good enough to say
so, as a fashion of speech; but, I don’t mean
any fashion of speech. Indeed, when I say I wish
we might be friends, I scarcely mean quite that, either.”
Charles Darnay—as was natural—asked
him, in all good-humour and good-fellowship, what
he did mean?
“Upon my life,” said Carton,
smiling, “I find that easier to comprehend in
my own mind, than to convey to yours. However,
let me try. You remember a certain famous occasion
when I was more drunk than—than usual?”
“I remember a certain famous
occasion when you forced me to confess that you had
been drinking.”
“I remember it too. The
curse of those occasions is heavy upon me, for I always
remember them. I hope it may be taken into account
one day, when all days are at an end for me!
Don’t be alarmed; I am not going to preach.”
“I am not at all alarmed.
Earnestness in you, is anything but alarming to me.”
“Ah!” said Carton, with
a careless wave of his hand, as if he waved that away.
“On the drunken occasion in question (one of
a large number, as you know), I was insufferable about
liking you, and not liking you. I wish you would
forget it.”
“I forgot it long ago.”
“Fashion of speech again!
But, Mr. Darnay, oblivion is not so easy to me, as
you represent it to be to you. I have by no means
forgotten it, and a light answer does not help me
to forget it.”
“If it was a light answer,”
returned Darnay, “I beg your forgiveness for
it. I had no other object than to turn a slight
thing, which, to my surprise, seems to trouble you
too much, aside. I declare to you, on the faith
of a gentleman, that I have long dismissed it from
my mind. Good Heaven, what was there to dismiss!
Have I had nothing more important to remember, in
the great service you rendered me that day?”
“As to the great service,”
said Carton, “I am bound to avow to you, when
you speak of it in that way, that it was mere professional
claptrap, I don’t know that I cared what became
of you, when I rendered it.—Mind!
I say when I rendered it; I am speaking of the past.”
“You make light of the obligation,”
returned Darnay, “but I will not quarrel with
your light answer.”
“Genuine truth, Mr. Darnay,
trust me! I have gone aside from my purpose;
I was speaking about our being friends. Now,
you know me; you know I am incapable of all the higher
and better flights of men. If you doubt it, ask
Stryver, and he’ll tell you so.”
“I prefer to form my own opinion,
without the aid of his.”
“Well! At any rate you
know me as a dissolute dog, who has never done any
good, and never will.”
“I don’t know that you `never will.’”
“But I do, and you must take
my word for it. Well! If you could endure
to have such a worthless fellow, and a fellow of such
indifferent reputation, coming and going at odd times,
I should ask that I might be permitted to come and
go as a privileged person here; that I might be regarded
as an useless (and I would add, if it were not for
the resemblance I detected between you and me, an
unornamental) piece of furniture, tolerated for its
old service, and taken no notice of. I doubt
if I should abuse the permission. It is a hundred
to one if I should avail myself of it four times in
a year. It would satisfy me, I dare say, to
know that I had it.”
“Will you try?”
“That is another way of saying
that I am placed on the footing I have indicated.
I thank you, Darnay. I may use that freedom
with your name?”
“I think so, Carton, by this time.”
They shook hands upon it, and Sydney
turned away. Within a minute afterwards, he
was, to all outward appearance, as unsubstantial as
ever.
When he was gone, and in the course
of an evening passed with Miss Pross, the Doctor,
and Mr. Lorry, Charles Darnay made some mention of
this conversation in general terms, and spoke of Sydney
Carton as a problem of carelessness and recklessness.
He spoke of him, in short, not bitterly or meaning
to bear hard upon him, but as anybody might who saw
him as he showed himself.
He had no idea that this could dwell
in the thoughts of his fair young wife; but, when
he afterwards joined her in their own rooms, he found
her waiting for him with the old pretty lifting of
the forehead strongly marked.
“We are thoughtful to-night!”
said Darnay, drawing his arm about her.
“Yes, dearest Charles,”
with her hands on his breast, and the inquiring and
attentive expression fixed upon him; “we are
rather thoughtful to-night, for we have something
on our mind to-night.”
“What is it, my Lucie?”
“Will you promise not to press
one question on me, if I beg you not to ask it?”
“Will I promise? What will I not promise
to my Love?”
What, indeed, with his hand putting
aside the golden hair from the cheek, and his other
hand against the heart that beat for him!
“I think, Charles, poor Mr.
Carton deserves more consideration and respect than
you expressed for him to-night.”
“Indeed, my own? Why so?”
“That is what you are not to ask me. But
I think—I know—he does.”
“If you know it, it is enough. What would
you have me do, my Life?”
“I would ask you, dearest, to
be very generous with him always, and very lenient
on his faults when he is not by. I would ask
you to believe that he has a heart he very, very seldom
reveals, and that there are deep wounds in it.
My dear, I have seen it bleeding.”
“It is a painful reflection
to me,” said Charles Darnay, quite astounded,
“that I should have done him any wrong.
I never thought this of him.”
“My husband, it is so.
I fear he is not to be reclaimed; there is scarcely
a hope that anything in his character or fortunes is
reparable now. But, I am sure that he is capable
of good things, gentle things, even magnanimous things.”
She looked so beautiful in the purity
of her faith in this lost man, that her husband could
have looked at her as she was for hours.
“And, O my dearest Love!”
she urged, clinging nearer to him, laying her head
upon his breast, and raising her eyes to his, “remember
how strong we are in our happiness, and how weak he
is in his misery!”
The supplication touched him home.
“I will always remember it, dear Heart!
I will remember it as long as I live.”
He bent over the golden head, and
put the rosy lips to his, and folded her in his arms.
If one forlorn wanderer then pacing the dark streets,
could have heard her innocent disclosure, and could
have seen the drops of pity kissed away by her husband
from the soft blue eyes so loving of that husband,
he might have cried to the night—and the
words would not have parted from his lips for the
first time—
“God bless her for her sweet compassion!”