THE AILING HEART
Not often in her life had Christina
felt so happy as she did at this fortunate hour.
Two things especially made her heart sing for joy;
one was the fact that Jamie had never been so tender,
so full of joyful anticipation, so proud of his love
and his future, as in their interview of that evening.
The very thought of his beauty and goodness made her
walk unconsciously to the door, and look over the sea
towards the fishing-grounds, where he was doubtless
working at the nets, and thinking of her. And
next to this intensely personal cause of happiness,
was the fact that of all his mates, and even before
his mother or Sophy, Andrew had chosen her
for his confidant. She loved her brother very
much, and she respected him with an equal fervour.
Few men, in Christina’s opinion, were able to
stand in Andrew Binnie’s shoes, and she felt,
as she glanced at his strong, thoughtful face, that
he was a brother to be very proud of.
He sat on the hearth with his arms
crossed above his head, and a sweet, grave smile irradiating
his strong countenance, Christina knew that he was
thinking of Sophy, and as soon as she had spread the
frugal meal, and they had sat down to their cakes
and cheese, Andrew began to talk of her. He seemed
to have dismissed absolutely the thought of the hidden
money, and to be wholly occupied with memories of his
love. And as he talked of her, his face grew
vivid and tender, and he spoke like a poet, though
he knew it not.
“She is that sweet, Christina,
it is like kissing roses to kiss her. Her wee
white hand on my red face is like a lily leaf.
I saw it in the looking-glass, as we sat at tea.
And the ring, with the shining stone, set it finely.
I am the happiest man in the world, Christina!”
“I am glad with all my heart
for you, Andrew, and for Sophy too. It is a grand
thing to be loved as you love her.”
“She is the sweetness of all
the years that are gone, and of all that are to come.”
“And Sophy loves you as you
love her? I hope she does that, my dear Andrew.”
“She will do. She will
do! no doubt of it, Christina! She is shy now,
and a bit frighted at the thought of marriage—she
is such a gentle little thing—but I will
make her love me; yes I will! I will make her
love me as I love her. What for not?”
“To be sure. Love must
give and take equal, to be satisfied. I know
that myself. I am loving Jamie just as he loves
me.”
“He is a brawly fine lad.
Peddie was saying there wasn’t a better worker,
nor a merrier one, in the whole fleet.”
“A good heart is always a merry one, Andrew.”
“I’m not doubting it.”
Thus they talked with kind mutual
sympathy and confidence; and a certain sweet serenity
and glad composure spread through the little room,
and the very atmosphere was full of the peace and hope
of innocent love. But some divine necessity of
life ever joins joy and sorrow together; and even
as the brother and sister sat speaking of their happiness,
Christina heard a footstep that gave her heart a shock.
Andrew was talking of Sophy, and he was not conscious
of Jamie’s approach until the lad entered the
house. His face was flushed, and there was an
air of excitement about him which Andrew regarded with
an instant displeasure and suspicion. He did
not answer Jamie’s greeting, but said dourly:—
“You promised to take my place
in the boat to-night, Jamie Logan; then what for are
you here, at this hour? I see one thing, and that
is, you cannot be trusted to.”
“I deserve a reproof, Andrew,
for I have earned it,” answered Jamie; and there
was an air of candid regret in his manner which struck
Christina, but which was not obvious to Andrew as he
added, “I’ll not lie to you, anent the
matter.”
“You needn’t. Nothing in life is
worth a lie.”
“That may be, or not be.
But it was just this way. I met an old friend
as I was on my way to the boat, and he was poor, and
hungry, and thirsty, and I be to take him to the ‘public,’
and give him a bite and a sup. Then the whiskey
set us talking of old times and old acquaintances,
and I clean forgot the fishing; and the boats went
away without me. And that is all there is to
it.”
“Far too much! Far too
much! A nice lad you will be to trust to in a
big ship full of men and women and children! A
glass of whiskey, and a crack in the public house,
set before your promised word and your duty!
How will I trust Christina to you? When you make
Andrew Binnie a promise, he expects you to keep it.
Don’t forget that! It may be of some consequence
to you if you are wanting his sister for a wife.”
With these words Andrew rose, went
into his own room without a word of good-night, and
with considerable show of annoyance, closed and bolted
the door behind him. Jamie sat down by Christina,
and waited for her to speak.
But it was not easy for her to do
so. Try as she would, she could not show him
the love she really felt. She was troubled at
his neglect of duty, and so sorry that he, of all
others, should have been the one to cast the first
shadow across the bright future which she had been
anticipating before his ill-timed arrival. It
was love out of time and season, and lacked the savour
and spontaneity which are the result of proper conditions.
Jamie felt the unhappy atmosphere, and was offended.
“I’m not wanted here,
it seems,” he said in a tone of injury.
“You are wanted in the boat,
Jamie; that is where the fault lies. You should
have been there. There is no outgait from that
fact.”
“Well then, I have said I was
sorry. Is not that enough?”
“For me, yes. But Andrew
likes a man to be prompt and sure in business.
It is the only way to make money.”
“Make money! I can make
money among Andrew Binnie’s feet, for all he
thinks so much of himself. A friend’s claims
are before money-making. I’ll stand to
that, till all the seas go dry.”
“Andrew has very strict ideas;
you must have found that out, Jamie, and you should
not go against them.”
“Andrew is headstrong as the
north-wind. He goes clear o’er the bounds
both sides. Everything is the very worst, or the
very best. I’m not denying I was a bit
wrong; but I consider I had a good excuse for it.”
“Is there ever a good excuse
for doing wrong, Jamie? But we will let the affair
drop out of mind and talk. There are pleasanter
things to speak of, I’m sure.”
But the interview was a disappointment.
Jamie went continually back to Andrew’s reproof,
and Christina herself seemed to be under a spell.
She could not find the gentle words that would have
soothed her lover, her manner became chill and silent;
and Jamie finally went away, much hurt and offended.
Yet she followed him to the door, and watched him kicking
the stones out of his path as he went rapidly down
the cliff-side. And if she had been near enough,
she would have heard him muttering angrily:—
“I’m not caring!
I’m not caring! The moral pride of they
Binnies is ridic’lus! One would require
to be a very saint to come within sight of them.”
Such a wretched ending to an evening
that had begun with so much hope and love! Christina
stood sadly at the open door and watched her lover
across the lonely sands, and felt the natural disappointment
of the circumstances. Then the moon began to
rise, and when she noticed this, she remembered how
late her mother was away from home, and a slight uneasiness
crept into her heart. She threw a plaid around
her head, and was going to the neighbour’s where
she expected to find her, when Janet appeared.
She came up to the cliff slowly, and
her face was far graver than ordinary when she entered
the cottage, and with a pious ejaculation threw off
her shawl.
“What kept you at all, Mother?
I was just going to seek you.”
“Watty Robertson has won away at last.”
“When did he die?”
“He went away with the tide.
He was called just at the turn. Ah, Christina,
it is loving and dying all the time! Life is love
and death; for what is our life? It is even a
vapour that appeareth for a little time, and then
vanisheth away.”
“But Watty was well ready for the change, Mother?”
“He went away with a smile.
And I staid by poor Lizzie, for I have drank of the
same cup, and I know how bitter was the taste of it.
Old Elspeth McDonald stretched the corpse, and her
and I had a change of words; but Lizzie was with me.”
“What for did you clash at such a like time?”
“She covered up his face, and
I said: ’Stop your hand, Elspeth. Don’t
you go to cover Watty’s face now. He never
did ill to any one while he lived, and there’s
no need to hide his face when he is dead.’
And we had a bit stramash about it, for I can’t
abide to hide up the face that is honest and well
loved, and Lizzie said I was right, and so Elspeth
went off in a tiff.”
“I think there must be ‘tiffs’
floating about in the air to-night. Jamie and
Andrew have had a falling out, and Jamie went away
far less than pleased with me.”
“What’s to do between them?”
“Jamie met with an old friend
who was hungry and thirsty, and he went with him to
the ‘public’ instead of going to the boat
for Andrew, as he promised to do. You know how
Andrew feels about a word broken.”
“Toots! Andrew Binnie
has a deal to learn yet. You should have told
him it was better to show mercy, than to stick at a
mouthful of words. Had you never a soft answer
to throw at the two fractious fools?”
“How could I interfere?”
“Finely! If you don’t
know the right way to throw with a thrawn man, like
Andrew, and to come round a soft man, like Jamie, I’m
sorry for you! A woman with a thimble-full of
woman-wit could ravel them both up—ravel
them up like a cut of worsteds.”
“Well, the day is near over.
The clock will chap twelve in ten minutes, and I’m
going to my bed. I’m feared you won’t
sleep much, Mother. You look awake to your instep.”
“Never mind. I have some
good thoughts for the sleepless. Folks don’t
sleep well after seeing a man with wife and bairns
round him look death and judgment in the face.”
“But Watty looked at them smiling, you said?”
“He did. Watty’s
religion went to the bottom and extremity of things.
I’ll be asking this night for grace to live with,
and then I’ll get grace to die with when my
hour comes. You needn’t fash your heart
about me. Sleeping or waking, I am in His charge.
Nor about Jamie; he’ll be all right the morn.
Nor about Andrew, for I’ll tell him not to make
a Pharisee of himself—he has his own failing,
and it isn’t far to seek.”
And it is likely Janet had her intended
talk with her son, for nothing more was said to Jamie
about his neglect of duty; and the little cloud was
but a passing one, and soon blew over. Circumstances
favoured oblivion. Christina’s love encompassed
both her brother and her lover, and Janet’s
womanly tact turned every shadow into sunshine, and
disarmed all suspicious or doubtful words. Also,
the fishing season was an unusually good one; every
man was of price, and few men were better worth their
price than Jamie Logan. So an air of prosperity
and happiness filled each little cottage, and Andrew
Binnie was certainly saving money—a condition
of affairs that always made him easy to live with.
As for the women of the village, they
were in the early day up to their shoulders in work,
and in the more leisurely evenings, they had Christina’s
marriage and marriage presents to talk about.
The girl had many friends and relatives far and near,
and every one remembered her. It was a set of
china from an aunt in Crail, or napery from some cousins
in Kirkcaldy, or quilts from her father’s folk
in Largo, and so on, in a very charming monotony.
Now and then a bit of silver came, and once a very
pretty American clock. And there was not a quilt
or a tablecloth, a bit of china or silver, a petticoat
or a ribbon, that the whole village did not examine,
and discuss, and offer their congratulations over.
Christina and her mother quite enjoyed
this popular manifestation of interest, and Jamie
was not at all averse to the good-natured familiarity.
And though Andrew withdrew from such occasions, and
appeared to be rather annoyed than pleased by the frequent
intrusion of strange women, neither Janet nor Christina
heeded his attitude very much.
“What for would we be caring?”
queried the mother. “There is just one
woman in the world to Andrew. If it was Sophy’s
wedding-presents now, he would be in a wonder over
them! But he is not wanting you to marry at all,
Christina. Men are a selfish lot. Somehow,
I think he has taken a doubt or a dislike to Jamie.
He thinks he isn’t good enough for you.”
“He is as good as I want him.
I’m feared for men as particular as Andrew.
They are whiles gey ill to live with. Andrew has
not had a smile for a body for a long time, and he
has been making money. I wonder if there is aught
wrong between Sophy and himself.”
“You might away to Largo and
ask after the girl. She hasn’t been here
in a good while. And I’m thinking yonder
talk she had with you anent Archie Braelands wasn’t
all out of her own head.”
So that afternoon Christina put on
her kirk dress, and went to Largo to see Sophy.
Her walk took her over a lonely stretch of country,
though, as she left the coast, she came to a lovely
land of meadows, with here and there waving plantations
of young spruce or fir trees. Passing the entrance
to one of these sheltered spots, she saw a servant
driving leisurely back and forward a stylish dog-cart;
and she had a sudden intuition that it belonged to
Braelands. She looked keenly into the green shadows,
but saw no trace of any human being; yet she had not
gone far, ere she was aware of light footsteps hurrying
behind her, and before she could realise the fact,
Sophy called her in a breathless, fretful way “to
wait a minute for her.” The girl came up
flushed and angry-looking, and asked Christina, “whatever
brought her that far?”
“I was going to Largo to see
you. Mother was getting worried about you.
It’s long since you were near us.”
“I am glad I met you. For I was wearied
with the sewing to-day, and I asked Aunt to let me
have a holiday to go and see you; and now we can go
home together, and she will never know the differ.
You must not tell her but what I have been to Pittendurie.
My goodness! It is lucky I met you.”
“But where have you been, Sophy?”
“I have been with a friend, who gave me a long
drive.”
“Who would that be?”
“Never you mind. There
is nothing wrong to it. You may trust me for
that, Christina. I was fairly worn out, and Aunt
hasn’t a morsel of pity. She thinks I ought
to be glad to sew from Monday morning to Saturday
night, and I tell you it hurts me, and gives me a cough,
and I had to get a breath of sea-air or die for it.
So a friend gave me what I wanted.”
“But if you had come to our
house, you could have got the sea-air finely.
Sophy! Sophy! I am misdoubting what you tell
me. How came you in the wood?”
“We were taking a bit walk by
ourselves there. I love the smell of the pines,
and the peace, and the silence. It rests me; and
I didn’t want folks spying, and talking, and
going with tales to Aunt. She ties me up shorter
than needs be now.”
“He was a mean fellow to leave
you here all by yourself.”
“I made him do it. Goodness
knows, he is fain enough to be seen by high and low
with me. But Andrew would not like it; he is that
jealous-natured—and I just be to
have some rest and fresh air.”
“Andrew would gladly give you both.”
“Not he! He is away to
the fishing, or about his business, one way or another,
all the time. And I am that weary of stitch, stitch,
stitching, I could cry at the thought of it.”
“Was it Archie Braelands that gave you the drive?”
“Ay, it was. Archie is
just my friend, nothing more. I have told him,
and better told him, that I am to marry Andrew.”
“He is a scoundrel then to take you out.”
“He is nothing of the kind.
He is just a friend. I am doing Andrew no wrong,
and myself a deal of good.”
“Then why are you feared for people seeing you?”
“I am not feared. But I
don’t want to be the wonder and the talk of
every idle body. And I am not able to bear my
aunt’s nag, nag, nag at me. I wish I was
married. It isn’t right of Andrew to leave
me so much to myself. It will be his own fault
if he loses me altogether. I am worn out with
Aunt Kilgour, and my life is a fair weariness to me.”
“Andrew is getting everything
brawly ready for you. I wish I could tell you
what grand plans he has for your happiness. Be
true to Andrew, Sophy, and you will be the happiest
bride, and the best loved wife in all Scotland.”
“Plans! What plans? What has he told
you?”
“I am not free to speak, Sophy.
I should not have said a word at all. I hope
you will just forget I have.”
“Indeed I will not! I will
make Andrew tell me his plans. Why should he
tell you, and not me? It is a shame to treat me
that way, and he shall hear tell of it.”
“Sophy! Sophy! I would
as lief you killed me as told Andrew I had given you
a hint of his doings. He would never forgive me.
I can no forgive myself. Oh what a foolish, wicked
woman I have been to say a word to you!” and
Christina burst into passionate weeping.
“Whist! Christina;
I’ll never tell him, not I! I know well
you slipped the words to pleasure me. But giff-gaff
makes us good friends, and so you must just walk to
the door with me and pass a word with my aunt, and
say neither this nor that about me, and I will forget
you ever said Andrew had such a thing as a ‘plan’
about me.”
The proposal was not to Christina’s
mind, but she was ready to face any contingency rather
than let Andrew know she had given the slightest hint
of his intentions. She understood what joy he
had in the thought of telling his great news to Sophy
at its full time, and how angry he would naturally
feel at any one who interfered with his designs.
In a moment, without intention, with the very kindest
of motives, she had broken her word to her brother,
and she was as miserable as a woman could be over
the unhappy slip. And Sophy’s proposal added
to her remorse. It made her virtually connive
at Sophy’s intercourse with Archie Braelands,
and she felt herself to be in a great strait.
In order to favour her brother she had spoken hastily,
and the swift punishment of her folly was that she
must now either confess her fault or tacitly sanction
a wrong against him.
For the present, she could see no
way out of the difficulty. To tell Andrew would
be to make him suspicious on every point. He would
then doubtless find some other hiding place for his
money, and if any accident did happen, her mother,
and Sophy, and all Andrew loved, would suffer for
her indiscretion. She took Sophy’s reiterated
promise, and then walked with the girl to her aunt’s
house. It was a neat stone dwelling, with some
bonnets and caps in the front window, and when the
door was opened, a bell rang, and Mistress Kilgour
came hastily from an inner room. She looked pleased
when she saw Sophy and Christina, and said:—
“Come in, Christina. I
am glad you brought Sophy home in such good time.
For I’m in a state of perfect frustration this
afternoon. Here’s a bride gown and bonnet
to make, and a sound of more work coming.”
“Who is to be married, Miss Kilgour?”
“Madame Kilrin of Silverhawes—a
second affair, Christina, and she more than middle-aged.”
“She is rich, though?”
“That’s it! rich, but
made up of odds and ends, and but one eye to see with:
a prelatic woman, too, seeking all things her own way.”
“And the man? Who is he?”
“He is a lawyer. Them gentry
have their fingers in every pie, hot or cold.
However, I’m wishing them nothing but good.
Madame is a constant customer. Come, come, Christina,
you are not going already?”
“I am hurried to-night.
Mistress Kilgour. Mother is alone. Andrew
is away to Greenock on business.”
“So you came back with Sophy.
I am glad you did. There are some folks that
are o’er ready to take charge of the girl, and
some that seem to think she can take charge of herself.
Oh, she knows fine what I mean!” And Miss Kilgour
pointed her fore-finger at Sophy and shook her head
until all the flowers in her cap and all the ringlets
on her front hair dangled in unison.
Sophy had turned suddenly sulky and
made no reply, and Miss Kilgour continued: “It
is her way always, when she has been to your house,
Christina. Whatever do you say to her? Is
there anything agec between Andrew and herself?
Last week and the week before, she came back from
Pittendurie in a temper no saint could live with.”
“I’m so miserable.
Aunt. I am miserable every hour of my life.”
“And you wouldn’t be happy
unless you were miserable, Sophy. Don’t
mind her talk, Christina. Young things in love
don’t know what they want.”
“I am sick, Aunt.”
“You are in love, Sophy, and
that is all there is to it. Don’t go, Christina.
Have a cup of tea first?”
“I cannot stop any longer.
Good-bye, Sophy. I’ll tell Andrew to come
and give you a walk to-morrow. Shall I?”
“If you like to. He will
not come until Sunday, though; and then he will be
troubled about walking on the Sabbath day. I’m
not caring to go out.”
“That is a lie, Sophy Traill!”
cried her aunt. “It is the only thing you
do care about.”
“You had better go home, Christina,”
said Sophy, with a sarcastic smile, “or you
will be getting a share of temper that does not belong
to you. I am well used to it.”
Christina made an effort to consider
this remark as a joke, and under this cover took her
leave. She was thankful to be alone with herself.
Her thoughts and feelings were in a tumult; she could
not bring any kind of reason out of their chaos.
Her chagrin at her own folly was sharp and bitter.
It made her cry out against herself as she trod rapidly
her homeward road. Almost inadvertently, because
it was the shortest and most usual way, she took the
route that led her past Braelands. The great
house was thrown open, and on the lawns was a crowd
of handsomely dressed men and women, drinking tea at
little tables set under the trees and among the shrubbery.
Christina merely glanced at the brave show of shifting
colour, and passed more quickly onward, the murmur
of conversation and the ripple of laughter pursuing
her a little way, for the evening was warm and quiet.
She thought of Sophy among this gay
crowd, and felt the incongruity of the situation,
and a sense of anger sprung up in her breast at the
girl’s wicked impatience and unfaithfulness.
It had caused her also to err, for she had been tempted
by it to speak words which had been a violation of
her own promise, and yet which had really done no good.
“She was always one of those
girls that led others into trouble,” she reflected.
“Many a scolding she has got me when I was a
wee thing, and to think that now! with the promise
to Andrew warm on my lips, I have put myself in her
power! It is too bad! It is not believable!”
She was glad when she came within
sight of the sea; it was like a glimpse of home.
The damp, fresh wind with its strong flavour of brine
put heart into her, and the few sailors and fishers
she met, with their sweethearts on their arms and
their blue shirts open at their throats, had all a
merry word or two to say to her. When she reached
her home, she found Andrew sitting at a little table
looking over some papers full of strange marks and
columns of figures. His quick glance, and the
quiet assurance of his love contained in it, went sorely
to her heart. She would have fallen at his feet
and confessed her unadvised admission to Sophy gladly,
but she doubted, whether it would be the kindest and
wisest thing to do.
And then Janet joined them, and she
had any number of questions to ask about Sophy, and
Christina, to escape being pressed on this subject,
began to talk with forced interest of Madame Kilrin’s
marriage. So, between this and that, the evening
got over without suspicion, and Christina carried
her miserable sense of disloyalty to bed and to sleep
with her—literally to sleep, for she dreamed
all night of the circumstance, and awakened in the
morning with a heart as heavy as lead.
“But it is just what I deserve!”
she said crossly to herself, as she laced her shoes,
“what need had I to be caring about Sophy Traill
and her whims? She is a dissatisfied lass at
the best, and her love affairs are beyond my sorting.
Serves you right, Christina Binnie! You might
know, if anybody might, that they who put their oar
into another’s boat are sure to get their fingers
rapped. They deserve it too.”
However, Christina could not willingly
dwell long on sorrowful subjects. She was always
inclined to subdue trouble swiftly, or else to shake
it away from her. For she lived by intuition,
rather than by reason; and intuition is born of, and
fed by, home affection and devout religion. Something
too of that insight which changes faith into knowledge,
and which is the birthright of primitive natures, was
hers, and she divined, she knew not how, that Sophy
would be true to her promise, and not say a word which
would lead Andrew to doubt her. And so far she
was right. Sophy had many faults, but the idea
of breaking her contract with Christina did not even
occur to her.
She wondered what plans Andrew had,
and what good surprise he was preparing for her, but
she was in no special hurry to find it out. The
knowledge might bring affairs to a permanent crisis
between her and Andrew,—might mean marriage—and
Sophy dreaded to face this question, with all its
isolating demands. Her “friendship”
with Archie Braelands was very sweet to her; she could
not endure to think of any event which must put a
stop to it. She enjoyed Archie’s regrets
and pleadings. She liked to sigh a little and
cry a little over her hard fate; to be sympathised
with for it; to treat it as if she could not escape
from it; and yet to be nursing in her heart a passionate
hope to do so.
And after all, the process of reflection
is unnatural and uncommon to nine tenths of humanity;
and so Christina lifted her daily work and interests,
and tried to forget her fault. And indeed, as
the weeks went on, she tried to believe it had been
no fault, for Sophy was much kinder to Andrew for
some time; this fact being readily discernible in
Andrew’s cheerful moods, and in the more kindly
interest which he then took in his home matters.
“For it is well with us, when
it is well with Sophy Traill, and we have the home
weather she lets us have,” Janet often remarked.
The assertion had a great deal of truth in it.
Sophy, from her chair in Mistress Kilgour’s
workroom, greatly influenced the domestic happiness
of the Binnie cottage, even though they neither saw
her, nor spoke her name. But her moods made Andrew
happy or miserable, and Andrew’s moods made
Janet and Christina happy or miserable; so sure and
so wonderful a thing is human solidarity. Yes
indeed! For what one of us has not known some
man or woman, never seen, who holds the thread of a
destiny and yet has no knowledge concerning it.
This thought would make life a desperate tangle if
we did not also know that One, infinite in power and
mercy, guides every event to its predestined and its
wisest end.
For a little while after Christina’s
visit, Sophy was particularly kind to Andrew; then
there came a sudden change, and Christina noticed that
her brother returned from Largo constantly with a heavy
step and a gloomy face. Occasionally he admitted
to her that he had been “sorely disappointed,”
but as a general thing he shut himself in his room
and sulked as only men know how to sulk, till the
atmosphere of the house was tingling with suppressed
temper, and every one was on the edge of words that
the tongue meant to be sharp as a sword.
One morning in October, Christina
met her brother on the sands, and he said, “I
will take the boat and give you a sail, if you like,
Christina. There is only a pleasant breeze.”
“I wish you would, Andrew,”
she answered. “This little northwester will
blow every weariful thought away.”
“I’m feared I have been
somewhat cross and ill to do for, lately. Mother
says so.”
“Mother does not say far wrong.
You have lost your temper often, Andrew, and consequent
your common sense. And it is not like you to be
unfair, not to say unkind; you have been that more
than once, and to two who love you dearly.”
Andrew said no more until they were
on the bay, then he let the oars drift, and asked:—
“What did you think of Sophy
the last time you saw her? Tell me truly, Christina.”
“Who knows aught about Sophy?
She hardly knows her own mind. You cannot tell
what she is thinking about by her face, any more than
you can tell what she is going to do by her words.
She is as uncertain as the wind, and it has changed
since you lifted the oars. Is there anything new
to fret yourself over?”
“Ay, there is. I cannot get sight of her.”
“Are you twenty-seven years
old, and of such a beggary of capacity as not to be
able to concert time and place to see her?”
“But if she herself is against
seeing me, then how am I going to manage?”
“What way did you find out that
she was against seeing you?”
“Whatever else could I think,
when I get no other thing but excuses? First,
she was gone away for a week’s rest, and Mistress
Kilgour said I had better not trouble her—she
was that nervous.”
“Where did she go to?”
“I don’t believe she was
out of her aunt’s house. I am sure the postman
was astonished when I told him she was away, and her
aunt’s face was very confused-like. Then
when I went again she had a headache, and could hardly
speak a word to me; and she never named about the week’s
holiday. And the next time there was a ball dress
making; and the next she had gone to the minister’s
for her ‘token,’ and when I said I would
go there and meet her, I was told not to think of such
a thing; and so on, and so on, Christina. There
is nothing but put-offs and put-bys, and my heart
is full of sadness and fearful wonder.”
“And if you do see her, what then, Andrew?”
“She is that low-spirited I
do not know how to talk to her. She has little
to say, and sits with her seam, and her eyes cast down,
and all her pretty, merry ways are gone far away.
I wonder where! Do you think she is ill, Christina?”
he asked drearily.
“No, I do not, Andrew.”
“Her mother died of a consumption,
when she was only a young thing, you know.”
“That is no reason why Sophy
should die of a consumption. Andrew, have you
ever told her what your plans are? Have you told
her she may be a lady and live in London if it pleases
her? Have you told her that you will soon be
Captain Binnie of the North Sea fleet?”
“No, no! What for would
I bribe the girl? I want her free given love.
I want her to marry plain Andrew Binnie. I will
tell her everything the very hour she is my wife.
That is the joy I look forward to. And it is
right, is it not?”
“No. It is all wrong.
It is all wrong. Girls like men that have the
spirit to win siller and push their way in the world.”
“I cannot thole the thought
of Sophy marrying me for my money.”
“You think o’er much of
your money. Ask yourself whether in getting money
you have got good, or only gold. And about marrying
Sophy, it is not in your hand. Marriages are
made in heaven, and unless there has been a booking
of your two names above, I am feared all your courting
below will come to little. Yet it is your duty
to do all you can to win the girl you want; and I
can tell you what will win Sophy Traill, if anything
on earth will win her.” Then she pointed
out to him how fond Sophy was of fine dress and delicate
living; how she loved roses, and violets, and the
flowers of the garden, so much better than the pale,
salt blossoms of the sea rack, however brilliant their
colours; how she admired such a house as Braelands,
and praised the glory of the peacock’s trailing
feathers. “The girl is not born for a poor
man’s wife,” she continued, “her
heart cries out for gold, and all that gold can buy;
and if you are set on Sophy, and none but Sophy, you
will have to win her with what she likes best, or
else see some other man do so.”
“Then I will be buying her, and not winning
her.”
“Oh you unspeakable man!
Your conceit is just extraordinary! If you wanted
any other good thing in life, from a big ship to a
gold ring, would you not expect to buy it? Would
your loving it, and wanting it, be sufficient?
Jamie Logan knew well what he was about, when he brought
us the letter from the Hendersons’ firm.
I love Jamie very dearly; but I’m free to confess
the letter came into my consideration.”
Talking thus, with the good wind blowing
the words into his heart, Christina soon inspired
Andrew with her own ideas and confidence His face
cleared; he began to row with his natural energy; and
as they stepped on the wet sands together, he said
almost joyfully:—
“I will take your advice, Christina.
I will go and tell Sophy everything.”
“Then she will smile in your
face, she will put her hand in your hand; maybe, she
will give you a kiss, for she will be thinking in her
heart, ‘how brave and how clever my Andrew is.’
And he will be taking me to London and making me a
lady!’ and such thoughts breed love, Andrew.
You are well enough, and few men handsomer or better—unless
it be Jamie Logan—but it isn’t altogether
the man; it is what the man can do.”
“I’ll go and see Sophy to-morrow.”
“Why not to-day?”
“She is going to Mariton House
to fit a dress and do some sewing. Her aunt told
me so.”
“If I was you, I would not let
her sew for strangers any longer. Go and ask
her to marry you at once, and do not take ‘no’
from her.”
“Your words stir my heart to
the bottom of it, and I will do as you say, Christina;
for Sophy has grown into my life, like my own folk,
and the sea, and the stars, and my boat, and my home.
And if she will love me the better for the news I
have to tell her, I am that far gone in love with
her I must even put wedding on that ground. Win
her I must; or else die for her.”
“Win her, surely; die for her,
nonsense! No man worth the name of man would
die because a woman wouldn’t marry him.
God has made more than one good woman, more than one
fair woman.”
“Only one woman for Andrew Binnie.”
“To be sure, if you choose to
limit yourself in that way. I think better of
you. And as for dying for a woman, I don’t
believe in it.”
“Poor Matt Ballantyne broke
his heart about Jessie Graham.”
“It was a very poor heart then.
Nothing mends so soon as a good heart. It trusts
in the Omnipotent, and gets strength for its need,
and then begins to look around for good it can do,
or make for others, or take to itself. If Matt
broke his heart for Jessie, Jessie would have been
poorly cared for by such a weak kind of a heart.
She is better off with Neil McAllister, no doubt.”
“You have done me good, Christina.
I have not heard so many sound observes in a long
time.”
And with that Janet came to the cliff-top
and called to them to hurry. “Step out!”
she cried, “here is Jamie Logan with a pocket
full of great news; and the fish is frying itself
black, while you two are daundering, as if it was
your very business and duty to keep hungry folk waiting
their dinner for you.”